To Katsuki Bakugou//BkDk

402 9 15
                                    

(I only own the plot, and idea all characters and are owned by Kohei Horikoshi)

Trigger Warnings: Su*c*de mentions, Death, homophobia, Internalized homophobia, Su*c*de note.

To Kacchan,

I'm glad you remembered where this was hidden!! I thought you would have forgotten where we would hide notes as kids, since you don't care about anymore that Is. although you might have not found it and I'm writing this to no one-

Well anyways if you've found this note It means Im either gone or Ive gone to far for you to stop me. Yes this Is what you think It Is. Before I go I needed to tell you something but you wouldn't listen to me, you always were a bad listener, so here It Is.

I'm sorry, Im so sorry, I never meant to make you hate me, Im sorry I was such a nuisance to you. I'm sorry I was a quirkless Deku. I don't know how this happened, how you started to hate me and bully me. We were such good friends, playing together, watching All Might movies, planning our future as the top hero team. I'm sorry that had to end, I'm sorry I was quirkless. I know it's my fault, it always is. 

I looked up to you, so so much. Even when you started to hit me, and hurt me, and hate me. I thought you were the coolest person alive even though you were a bully, I even favored you over All Might, yep that's correct. You were my Idol. Not him. Eventually I caught these, these, feelings. I didn't know what they were or why I had them for you, then one day I figured it out. It was love. I was disgusted with myself. Falling In love was bad enough, it never works out anyways. Or at least that's what my dad said when I told him. Then He called me a faggot, and apparently I'm a disgrace. I guess I started believing It, when you think about it he's not wrong. Me liking another person, one so ahead of me all the time? And then add the fact he's a BOY and Its ten times worse. I hated these feelings I had for you and I wanted/want them to stop, haha, at least that wish will finally come true, unlike the one of me being a hero.

That's another thing I won't be able to do because of this fucked up society divided by quirks. Although on the other hand It could just be because Im weak, and useless and it might not have anything to with me being quirkless. Even All Might said I couldn't be a hero, telling me to throw away all my dreams and become a policeman, to be more realistic. That's not really something you should tell a kid I guess, but he's right. It was a dream, and that's all. Simply wishful thinking I guess.

Oops, Im ranting again aren't I, you never liked when I did that did you. Even as I write this letter I can sense the annoyance you probably feel with me wasting your time as you have to read this. Your probably wondering how much longer you have to put up with this stupid, unorganized letter. Sorry about that Kacchan.

You probably don't want me to call you that do you? I'm sure It annoyed you all the time. I figured you wouldn't like it when we got to middle school and would force me to stop calling you that, but you let me call you Kacchan so I cherished it. It's a stupid nickname I know, but at least It was our stupid nickname. As I write this letter in our classroom. I can feel you glaring at me, wishing I would just leave already. Ha, little do you know this will be the last you ever see of me, today or ever. Well, except for the funeral. I bet Auntie will force you to go.

I assume you think I hate you and and one point, maybe I did. but the thing I see you were right! I don't have any resentment towards you anymore, and even after all the crap you put me through I still look up you. I don't regret what Im going to/have done. I have no room for hesitation, or I may freak and not go through with it. And while I'm sad to leave you, mom, and auntie, this Is the best for us, for all of us. Nobody had faith In me. Not even my mom believed In me. Plus my dad hated me for being a fag. And you, well you gave the best option, said the right words and always made sure I knew that I was a just a stupid, quirkless, Deku.

Well, I'd say this letter Is long enough, your probably bored already anyways. Wanting me to just finish up so you can say your rid of me once and for all. That's okay though, Im finally going to do what you always wanted!! Aren't you happy Kacchan!! You won't have to deal with me anymore because Im going to, how did you say? oh yeah. "Take a swan dive of the roof" yep!! that's what Im going to do or probably by the time your done reading this, have done. 

If you want to know where I am, remember where we used to go as kids? The place that we used to look down an drop things Into to see If we could hear the splash? I know you remember now, you wouldn't forget our only other special place. That place we would run to, and play games near, where our parents took that picture of me kissing you on the check as a younger kid? It's my solace, I'd often walk there to sit, with my legs dangling over the side of the cliff waiting for the right time, the right day the right moment.  

Well today's that day, do you remember never hearing the splash when we threw rocks down the valley? It was too far right, maybe, but Im thinking, maybe what we used just wasn't heavy or big enough!! Maybe If you run, you'll be able to hear the splash I make when I fall down. I have to finish this now, your coming over and I don't want you to see It before Im gone!! That would ruin your surprise. 

Izuku                                                                                                                                                                                        


And that's the end. Let me know if you liked it (if anyone reads it) I'm actually pretty proud of this and I wrote it in an awful mood. Don't forget to vote if you liked it!! 

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