Love Can Be Deadly

Loved by a Mother

While waiting for Minerva with the tea, I felt guilt for being born. 'If I wasn't born at all...I wouldn't have this problem with my parents.' I thought. My thoughts were interrupted with a small sound of tea cups being placed on the hard wooded dining table.

"Tell me dear, how bad was it to make your hair white? Be thankful it's not your whole head, just a few strands here and there." Minerva said, inspecting my hair to see if there are anymore.

I stayed silent for a while since I don't like those memories.
"Uhm...well...only my dad calls me weak, selfish, and he said that he wished I was never born." I say softly while looking down, hiding the tears that rolled down my cheeks.

"Oh dear. I'm terribly sorry. Please, no need to cry. I'm sorry for asking. Now, what do you say we go eat? Ice cream perhaps?" My eyes lit up and I started walking towards the door without tripping, this time.

Minerva cleared her throat. "Ms. (L/n), may I warn you to not get carried away again. You know you can't handle...'brainfreeze', as some would call it. Remember last time? You barely licked the ice cream 3 times and banged your head like a baboon to make it stop." Minerva chuckled as she remembered me crying on her robes to make the brainfreeze go away.
"Yes, I remember. I'm sorry for soaking your robes. But I make no promises!" I said while running out the door. Minerva sighed. With a flick of her wand, she was dressed in black bootcut pants, black low heel boots, a dark green soft cotton blouse, a white scarf around her neck, and her hair tied into a bun.

*Time Skip*
"Ms. (L/n), I am not helping you this time. You got your finger stuck inside the bottle and now you have to figure out how to take it out." Minerva said coming back home from the park where I found a small baby sized water bottle laying on the ground after our ice cream adventure.

"Please help me! My finger might get swollen. Think about the children." I begged with puppy eyes. Minerva pressed her lips into a straight line and sighed. "Very well, let me help you." Minerva said while closing the front door. Before minerva could get a hold of my hand, there was a knock at the door.
"Oh, were you expecting visitors? I can leave for a while...with my bottle." I say looking at my finger, twisting the bottle with my free hand.

"No worries dear, I invited Professor Snape. I need a few things from him."
I shot my head up to see Minerva turning the knob and opening the front door. I felt a lump in my throat whenever I heard the words 'Professor Snape'. I wanted to run and hide, but couldn't. I froze as I saw a tall figure with black robes step forward into Minerva's house.

"Severus, it's good to see you again. Have you brought the potions?" Minerva questioned the potions master.
"Indeed. 4 just like you said." Professor Snape said not noticing me while handing Minerva the bottles delicately.
'Wow...does his voice go deeper every year? Very attractive indeed.' I thought, forgetting about the situation with my finger.

Professor Snape turned his head towards me with a raised eyebrow. 'Oop- did I say that out loud? I don't think I did. It would be embarrassing if he could read my mind.' Suddenly I was staring into Professor Snape's eyes and started to feel hot. I turned my body around so my back faced him. I started walking slowly towards my bedroom but was stopped by a deep velvety voice. "And what might you be doing here Ms. (L/n)?" Professor Snape asked with an unreadable expression.

"Uhm...I-" I started but was interrupted by Minerva.
"Ms (L/n) is staying the next 2 weeks here until school resumes. Her parents are 'out of town' and she needed a place to stay." Minerva said turning to me with a small smile. I nod and go back to figuring out how to get the bottle off my finger.
"Very well. I will see you both in 2 weeks. Also...twist and pull Ms. (L/n)." Professor Snape said while turning towards the front door. After trying his method, I got my finger out of the bottle and thanked the potions master. "Thank you, professor." Snape rolled his eyes and left closing the door behind him.

"Now that you got your finger out of the bottle, off to bed. Come on now, don't want to ruin your sleep schedule now do we?" Minerva asked with a serious tone.

"No ma'am. Goodnight Minerva."

"Goodnight dear."

*Time skip*
It was the day before school starts. I felt nervous again, as if I was in my first year. Butterflies were in my stomach, hands cold but sweaty, wanted to vomit what I ate for breakfast but decided to hold it in if possible. Minerva helped me buy school supplies and made sure I had everything I needed, especially my own owl, Clutz. I named my snowy white owl Clutz because he never landed perfectly and always missed me when it came to handing out the mail.
While organizing my things for tomorrow, I decided to sit outside for a while with mittens after I was done packing. The sun was warm and felt good on my skin. The wind had a perfect breeze as I lied down on the soft green grass with mittens on my chest getting comfortable.

After sundown, I decided to cook dinner since I wanted to at least repay Minerva for letting me stay these last 2 weeks. It's not much but I feel like it's a start. I can repay her back during my time at Hogwarts. Making chicken alfredo was one of my favorite foods, hoping Minerva would like it too. Setting up the dining table, Minerva walked in with her black robes and fluffy white slippers. She was shocked to see a full pot of chicken alfredo, a bottle of Wine and one wine cup, since I know not to drink wine...in front of a Professor that is.

"Ms. (L/n), you didn't have to do all this. Especially the day before school starts. You need to save up your energy dear."
Minerva said pouring wine into her cup.
"I know, but I wanted to at least repay you for letting me stay here. You have no idea how much I felt loved these past weeks than from my parents the past...17 years." I said the last part as a whisper but enough for Minerva to hear. "No dear. It is an honor for me to take care of a special girl who I see as a daughter. And I want you to know, that if you decide to not go back home with your parents after the school year ends, you are more than welcome to live with me...permanently." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Tears started rolling down my cheeks and was speechless. All I could do was nod and let out a quiet sob, remembering all the times my mom and dad said to me while living there during the summer.

*Flashback*
"(Y/n)! Get down here this instant!" my mother shouted from the kitchen. "I'm coming mom."
"What is the matter with you?! Why didn't you clean up this mess when I told you an hour ago?! You never help around the house, always in your room, and probably practicing magic that doesn't even exist. Just because you believe in that stuff doesn't make you special. Clean this up now!" My mother shouted. I held back tears and let my mother take out all her frustrations on me. I obeyed and cleaned up the kitchen until it was spotless.
My father came in and did not say a word after inspecting the kitchen to make sure it was clean. "Stupid girl." my father muttered while turning towards the door and walking away. I heard my father but did not get mad nor sad. I knew I was dumb, worthless, waste of space, and not needed in this world...even thinking I'm not needed in the afterlife too. I felt a very tiny, barely feeling a pinch in my heart when he said those words.
*End of Flashback*

"Ms. (L/n)? Are you alright dear? You've been staring at your food for 10 min." Minerva said with a worried look in her face. "Hm? Oh... I'm sorry, just thinking. I guess I lost my appetite but I hope you liked the food." I say with a sad smile. Although Minerva was not convinced with my answer, she let it go, knowing I could get hurt...again. "Yes dear, it was lovely. Thank you. Now off to bed, wouldn't want you waking up late for your first day of school." Minerva stood up and with a flick of her wand, the food is stored in the fridge and dishes were being cleaned.

While thinking about the memory, I stared at the ceiling lying on my bed. Remembering those words from my father that I love, 'stupid girl', was the only thing on my mind. Those words were the first hurtful words I took in. When I love someone, I love that person with all my heart. But when the person I love with all my heart says something to hurt me...a strand of hair turns white.