what if i love you?

chapter three

Weylin's POV...

It was the first official day of school. I woke up, showered, got dressed, and cleaned up. Jude still wasn't awake. I went over to him and tried waking him up. 

"Jude wake up. Classes start today and we both have lecture hall first. I won't be late and I won't let you be late either."

Nothing.

"Jude!"

Nothing. 

I walked over to the kitchenette, grabbed a cup of water, and walked back to Jude's bed. I threw the cup of ice cold water on him and watched as he jumped up, shouting.

"WEYLIN!"

"Finally. I thought I was gonna have to stab you in order for you to wake up." 

"You fucking asshole!" He got out of bed and shoved me out of the way. "Why the hell would you pour water on me to wake me up? You could've, I don't know, shook me awake like you did yesterday." 

"You're right, my apologies." I smiled.

"Fuck off."

Jude's POV...

Today marks day ten thousand of being annoyed by Weylin. Water? C'mon man. 

"I said I was sorry." He was running up behind me on our way to class. 

"And I said fuck off."

I turned back to see him frown then walk away.

I entered lecture hall five minutes late and Mr. Larue gave me a harsh look. I walked up the steps and sat at the top far in the back, I got a good view of the class. I found myself searching for Weylin and when I noticed that he wasn't here, I grew confused. I whipped out my phone and pulled up his contact - I forgot I still had his number - to text him. Three minutes went by. Nothing. Seven minutes. Nothing. And just like that, an hour passed and Mr. Larue is letting us go. I walked around campus trying to find Weylin because he never misses class. He was never absent in high school, not one day. Even when he had a temperature of 102.7, he still showed up. He always shows up. 

After twenty minutes of looking for him, I came up with nothing. I checked the library, Tara's building, our building, different classrooms; nothing. I was about to give up until I spotted Tara across the way.

"Tara!" I shouted out.

She looked at me and confusion flashed across her face. "Jude, hey."

"Hey have you seen Weylin? I might've upset him earlier and he never showed up to lecture hall and I've checked literally everywhere." I got out in one breath. 

"He didn't show up? He never-"

"Never misses class I know."

"Well, there's one spot we found on the first day here. It's outside of D Building, a little patch of grass with a cherry tree. He said that would be nice place to retreat to and read at. That's the only place I would think he'd be at."

"Thank you." I planted a kiss on her cheek and ran off. 

I got to the the place she was talking about and sure enough, he's here. He has a book in his hand and looks focused, until I step on a stick and he looks up. 

"Hey." I say.

"Hey."

"You weren't in lecture hall."

"I know."

"Why?"

"I guess I needed time for myself. And ditching class to come over here sounded much better than sitting in class with Mr. Larue."

He seemed so...sad. The Weylin I knew in high school was the happiest, most put together guy ever. I could see something was bothering him but I didn't feel the need to pry. 

"I'll go, I have my English literature class in ten."

"I know, I'm in that class too." He chuckled. 

"Right. I forgot you were an English major too."

He got up, put his things together, and we walked off to class. 

Weylin's POV...

I couldn't focus at all today. Everything that happened was all a blur. I got back to the room a few minutes before Jude. I set my things down and flopped onto my bed. I can't tell what's wrong with me but I feel like there's a storm cloud hovering over me and won't go away.

Jude barges in with two six packs in his hands. "Who wants to get drunk!"

I sat up and studied him. "You're already buzzed aren't you?"

"Why of course. Here," He motioned to a full six pack in his right hand. "This is yours."

He set it down on the counter and then cracked another beer for himself. I eyed the six pack on the counter and debated whether I should drink on a school night. 

"C'mon Weylin, lighten up and get druuunk!" 

"Fine. One beer."

An hour later...

"No because I swear Roslyn liked me!" I pleaded, extremely drunk.

"Duuude, she is so gay you know that right?"

"Woah really? That's cool."

He paused and looked at me. "You know I'm gay too."

"Uh of course I knew I mean you kissed me in Sophomore year at Cat's party." I laughed while cracking open my last beer. 

"Ahhh right right."

We kinda just stared at each other now. I could feel the awkwardness in the air. 

"You didn't talk to me after that. Not one word." He reminded me. 

"I know."

"What so you're homophobic?"

"What? No of course not. I- it wouldn't make sense for me to be homophobic." 

"Why? Why didn't you talk to me? We were friends and you ghosted me. And I hated you for that, I still do. I mean I admit I messed up and it was stupid but damn." He was kind of slurring his words and half laughing. 

"It was just- can we not talk about it? It's not exactly a conversation I wanna have whilst both of us are hammered."

"Sure sure. I'm gonna hit the hay! Night." 

"Good night Jude."

Jude's POV...

"Good night Jude." God why did he have to say it like that. 

I got into bed and pulled the covers over me. I pulled my shirt off and threw it across the room. I stay awake thinking about my conversation with Weylin and how he said it wouldn't make sense for him to be homophobic. Is he gay? No, he couldn't be. I've seen him with girls all the time. It sat in my brain for a while before I finally fell asleep.