death.

emma wilson, a 15 y/o, no friends no siblings. nothing to live for so why? why does she stay? after months of heartache and her mind screaming at her to not eat or to just kill herself? she chose to satay for him. he was the reason shes still alive. after all the arguments the sex the slamming of doors after all the apologising after all the tears what have been shedded why her? why would he choose her? god knows. 5'0 95 lbs eating disorder depression eating away her mind problems her trauma her cold heart her brown sholder length hair her beautiful bright blue eyes. he loved her because he knew there was a good side thst he will be able to find. sooner or later he found her, he found the funny playful girl he knew he was gonna find, after months of trying he finally gets there. he gets to his goal. but thats for later right now we are talking about the beginning of this story line.

emma was hopsitalized for an eating disorder,her dad had entered the room with tears in his eyes. he looked at her and asked with his voice breaking"why couldnt you talk to me? i love you i only want the best for you in life please let me help you" her mom just sat there with a blank expression on her face like she knew it was gonna happen. her dad walked out the room in distress emma looked at her mom and said shaking"do you even care?" this is when things started to get bad. popular beautiful emma turned into the loser of the school year. her friends had ditched her after she was hospitalized but she still had elijah. elijah stuck with her  till the very end. but this is before he came into her life, she met hunter, they instantly clicked.

its not that she wanted to die, she craved to be hungry all the time even when she was it wasnt enough. she craved to be skinny "ill stop when im thin enough" but you dont stop that do you, you dont decide when you stop because you cant, you just crave it more and more and more and you cant stop it. throwing up after you eat chugging water " no im not hungry thank you"or "i had a big breakfast im full" nothing is gonna stop you? chugging water before every meal or thinking "if you eat that you will regret it. you wanna be skinny dont you?" the taste of skinny is better then the taste of that fatass.

the sleeves slowly turned longer and longer as the months get by but nobody realises. nobody realised she was in so much fucking pain, nobody realises the posotive things she done only the mistakes, but thats okay right? she thought. every moment led up to her being hospitalised every comment they made on her figure made her push even harder then before. nobody realised the scars on her wrists because they where that blind. nobody realised how much pain they put her through, not like they cared..right? so..? why shouldnt i die..? her last thoughts before she drifted off to sleep. a week later emma was able to go home. as her dad was driving home her dad looked at her through the mirror and asked politely " how are you? do you wanna talk about anything?" emma declined the offer. "things will get better i promise"

as she walks through the door she sighed, walking up the stairs she goes into her room and sits on her bed while checking her messages seen as she didnt have her phone, things where okay until school two weeks after she gotten home. she looked at the time on her old broken phone which was passed down from her mom. her friends looked at her in disbelief and walked away.

as she walks home with all the suicidal thoughts in her head telling her to end it all she looks over the bridge to see if it would do enough damage, under neath was a train track with passing trains she sees a boy, tall, brown hair green eyes he was waiting for the train to come so he could end his life. with her music blasting in her headphone she bolts down the crooked stairs as the train comes at full speed, the love of her life noticed her running and slownly walked up to the train with tears falling down his cheek, wind blowing through his hair and he smiles, not out of happiness, out of anger. how many times that girl hurt his heart and not thinking about her actions, every moment led up to this moment. she screams his name her flashbacks flooding in as he drops to the floor she drags him to the side and pulls him close while comforting him, time passes, as they make there way up to the bridge he thanks her she whispers in his ear"dont worry elijah, i love you," elijah gets up and sighs " im sorry i didnt know what was going on, i guess i got a bit overwhelmed" emma looks up with tears in her eyes and stands up and said"cmon lets go home now, ill walk you."

its 3:04am on a school night, emma slowly and carefully sneaks into the bathroom to grab the blades, she gets into her freshly cleaned bedroom and lights a calde. wrote her note and said her goodbyes. one..two..three.. she starts dragging the blade down her arm. as the feeling of regret sunk into her cold heart she goes numb. wanting to feel something she did it again.. and again.. emma slips into bed, will she finally be happy again? is this the end? her final thoughts drifted away as she closed her eyes and smiled.