Starry I think not (terrorcest)

Deleted Scene #1

Tommy Lee

(This one is what was originally supposed to happen in the 'Silver Spoon And A Needle' chapter, which I then scrapped and rewrote because I didn't like it very much. Also I'm very sick atm so I can't keep my eyes open long enough to update anything else. Also, got my information here from Jon Alota)

"I'LL FUCKING DO IT! GET OUT LEE! GO BACK TO YOUR HAPPY FUCKING LIFE. IF YOU DON'T LEAVE I'LL BLOW MY FUCKING BRAINS OUT! IT WOULD MAKE A LOT OF PEOPLE MUCH HAPPIER!!" Nikki screams, and I see him place the barrel of the gun against his left temple.

Something tells me that I should leave, but my feet are rooted into place. I can't leave him like this, shivering and holding a gun to his head. I care too much to do this to him. I'm actually scared for him, and it feels like trying to negotiate with someone who's taken a hostage.

"Nikki, put the gun down." I say, trying to act calm.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Nikki yells, and I can hear him cock the gun.

I make a split second decision, and start to run towards him. His eyes flash, and his hand jerks. Everything seems to happen in slow motion. The gun fires, and Nikki goes limp. The gun falls from his hand, and I scream.

Blood is everywhere, dripping down his neck, coating the walls, and oozing from the gaping wound. He missed his actual temple, which means that he probably missed his brain. Hopefully. I don't even stop screaming as I run over to him, grabbing his limp body. He's not moving at all. I can't seem to wake him, and I have no way to tell if he's breathing.

"TOMMY?!" Vince yells, and I hear his feet thundering up the stairs.

My throat has gone dry as I try to call out to Vince and let him know where we are. All I can do is pull Nikkis body into my lap and cradle him. I try to keep his hair out of the wound, silently praying. Vince gasps, and I look up to see him in the doorway. His face has horror written on it, evident and sad.

"Call-call an ambulance." I manage to croak, on the verge of tears.

"Oh...fuck...okay..." Vince darts out of the room, leaving me alone with Nikkis body.

"Nikki, please stay with me, please. Fuck dude, I need you. Please Sixx, please. Come on..." I whisper tearfully, placing my hand over where his heart is, and not being able to feel anything.

"Okay they're coming!!" Vince shouts, running back into the room.

I start full blown crying, tears clouding my vision. I can't live without Nikki, and I'd never be able to live if I knew that this happened all because of a stupid fucking drug. I'd just kill myself if he died, no two ways about it. I don't give a shit about what Heather would think. I couldn't do this without him.

"T-Tommy it's alright." Vince says, looking an odd shade of green.

I nod, waiting for the paramedics to arrive. When they actually do, I have to be dragged away from Nikkis body. I can see them analyzing him, fixing up the wound itself temporarily, and then they start to check for a pulse.

"I have a pulse, but it's threading in and out." A paramedic says, as they load his bloody body onto the stretcher.

"ETA?" another asks, starting to carry the stretcher down the stairs.

"Six minutes." The medic replies.

"WAIT!" I yell, gathering the ability to stand up.

I dash after them, and they let me into the ambulance. Once I'm there, the only thing I can focus on is Nikki. He looks so...so unlike the Nikki that I love. Pale, jaundiced around the eyes and mouth, veins in his arms and neck a weird shade. Bruises and bloody holes in his arms. It's sickening to see what's happened to him. How did he do this to himself without any of us noticing? Has he ever shot himself before? Maybe I just caused it all.

Why? Why did he seem so scared of me? Why did he seem so scared that I was there? WHY DID HE EVEN HAVE A GUN NEARBY?! My mind is swirling and tumbling, suffocating me, and blurring out everything else. I need answers, and I need to know. I need Nikki to be okay so I can confess everything.

"Mr. Lee?" A EMT places her hand on my shoulder.

"W-what?" I ask.

"You've been sitting alone in the ambulance for ten minutes. Your friend is inside getting the help he needs, and you need to come in too." She says in a comforting tone.

"Okay..." I sigh.

The EMT leads me inside, and into a room where Nikki is. He's tucked neatly under sheets, bandage on the side of his head. All I can see though, is the crazed look he had when he pulled the trigger. We've all been known to go too far once or twice, but he did something that's fucking terrible. Even for Mötley Crüe.

"Oh Nikki..." I sigh, dropping into a chair and falling asleep

-------

Doctors say that the bullet wasn't designed to explode on impact, so that helped shrapnel removal. The bullet did nick his brain, causing some internal bleeding though. Nikki has been in a coma for the last three days, and I'm starting to seriously worry.

I haven't been home in that time, and I have no idea what's happened in the world since, other than what Vince, Mick, and Doc tell me. Doc says that Heather has practically gone psychotic, because I haven't been home in three days and "haven't even bothered to call her". Honestly, at this point I could care less about what Heather fucking does.

" Nikki. Come on Sixx. Life's no fun without you." I say, placing my head in his lap.

He doesn't wake up. Damn it. I've been hoping he will.

My stomach grumbles, reminding me that I haven't eaten since yesterday. I've been trying not to leave his side, which means I haven't showered either. I smell like a hot dumpster fire. But honestly, I need my food.

"Okay Sixxter. Need food, I promise I'm coming back soon." I say, unfolding myself from the unnecessarily uncomfortable hospital chair.

When I get back, I see him sitting up in bed, off his ventilator.

"NIKKI!" I scream joyfully, running toward him