"It's 1:23 — filming time, my love! I can still feel it, the hyping feeling this gives me. It's your cam, eh? I wanna record this one like you're the one recording me. I don't have much time, I just have 3 minutes and 21 seconds so I'll make this quick and straight to the point. I'll send you my deepest gratitude for staying with me through thick and thins like our vows. I'd love to see that smile again and feel that emotion one more time. Wedding? Again? Well... That'll feel more surreal, no? I'd love to have one more. I'd be the happiest if I can vow in front of Him again telling you how much I'm passionate about every bits of you. Should I go? (Taehyung looked at the man behind the camera and saw him nodding so he smiled.) Love, I've told you this thousands, even millions of times before but I'll tell you again—I love you. The society won't stop me from being deeply and madly in love with you. I've given you the assurance already. I hope you can see my sacrifices. I hope someday you'll stop in your trail just to reminisce about the good things that happened to us. I'm sorry for being a failure. I'm sorry if I'm not enough. Please do remember that I'm not blaming you for loving someone while we're together because I'm blaming myself more for letting you fall out of love and breaking my promise — the promise that I won't let us lose that spark. I'm really sorry—— (Taehyung wanted to talk more but the one filming him motioned that he only have 30 seconds more.) I love you, I did, I still do, and I will always do. Be happy even if it's not with me. Goodbye, love."
Taehyung cried and cried while grieving for the love that he's lost. The only thing that keep him going is now gone. What's the purpose of living if you're dead inside? Taehyung didn't know. He badly want to end the pain by ending his life but that will only mean he'll break another promise he told the love of his life and he can't do that. It hurts so much to see Jungkook smiling while Taehyung is still longing for him and his love. Only He knows how much it hurts to see Jungkook smile and cry while waiting for the woman he chose to love next to Taehyung but Taehyung can't do anything but to pretend that he's okay and happy with it in front of many but the truth is, everytime that he's at their old home and he's alone he can't help but weep and numb himself with the help of alcohol.
"That is love. You have to take risks, it's either you win or you lose. After all being in love is the most magical feeling one have felt so it's really worth the risk — Jungkook is worth the risk. At least I became happy for once." Taehyung thought to himself.
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Written : December 16,2020
