ON HOLD; It's No Fun Being This Smart | ONC2021

Patterns

Minutes passed without anyone entering the restroom. Eventually, Isla heard the dinging of a clock, which meant that it was 1 o'clock, which meant that Isla was late for Social Science. Still hipugging her legs on the toilet, Isla sighed, detecting an unpleasant pattern. She knew that patterns meant something repeating in the same order as before. Whenever she'd hide in a school restroom, one of two patterns of events happened.

Pattern A: a classmate would come in and ask her to come out. Then, when she would grunt. Then, the classmate would call a teacher. Then, the teacher would tell her to come out and say sorry, even if she didn't know what she did wrong.

Pattern B, which is the pattern she detected this time: a classmate would come in and ask her to come out. Then, she would grunt. Then, the classmate would call a teacher. Then, no one would come. Then, the school day would go on as normal. Then, at dismissal time, the last teacher would say something like "Everyone can go now, except Isla, because we need to talk." Then, once everyone else left, the teacher would say something like "What happened." Then, Isla would say "Mmm," because she never figured out how to tell anyone about the static without sounding like she was making it up. Then, the teacher would get mad, tell her she wasn't a baby anymore, and tell her to go.

Isla sided her tears with her elbow and left the stall. As she made her way down the hall, a pattern of questions played in her head. What would happen after the teacher talked to her? Would she still go to tutoring? Would she skip it? Would she still go to tutoring? Would she skip it? Would she still go to tutoring? Would she skip it? The questions kept repeating in her head as she entered the classroom, ignoring the stares. The questions kept repeating as Miss Lopez told her off for being late, as Isla apologized, as Miss Lopez shook her head, and as Isla took her seat. The questions kept repeating as Isla tried (and failed) to listen to Miss Lopez's lecture, as Miss Lopez left, and as math class came and went.

Then math class ended. Isla had her head resting in her arm, leaning on the table.

Sir Reyes's watch beeped. He said "Well, that's time. After the greeting, I want Isla to stay for a bit. Good day and thank you, class."

The class stood up. Isla mumbled along as her classmates said "Good day and thank you, sir."

The class cleared out. Isla asked Li her questions, but Li ran outside without listening. The static came back. Isla squinted and took a breathe.

Within seconds, Isla's classmates had all left.

Sir Reyes, from his desk in the front corner, turned to Isla. "Let's talk here."

Sir Reyes sat on his chair. Isla stood on the opposite side of his desk. She fixed her gaze on his shirt, (looking at his face felt wrong.) For a moment, she thought about what to say.

Isla thought, "maybe if I can just explain properly, I can break the pattern. Yeah, I think that will work."

After a few quiet moments, Sir Reyes said "So, I heard you were crying early. What happened?"

Isla looked up at him and forced her mouth open.

Alas, nothing came out.

She closed her mouth and went "Mmmmm."

Sir Reyes sighed, "What do you mean 'mmmmm'? You don't cry if nothing's wrong, right? So just tell me."

Isla felt the tears building up. She wanted to say "Something is wrong, but no one ever thinks it wrong. My head feels like static and I can't think, but you wouldn't understand that. They wouldn't understand that. No one ever does. Can you please stop calling me out. I've heard this over and over. I want to stop. I do, but I can't." She clenched her fists and moved her mouth. All that came out was "Mmmmm."

Sir Reyes sighed. "If you don't tell me we can't fix it. Do I have to call your parents?"

Isla looked down. She didn't want to bother her parents. It wasn't like they wouldn't care, it's just that she was scared they would make the wrong kind of fuss and make things worse. Then, she remembered she still didn't know if she was supposed to go to tutoring, which made her feel shaky on the inside.

"Well?" asked Sir Reyes.

Still looking down, Isla bit her lip and shook her head.

Sir Reyes sighed so loud, Isla worried that the older kids upstairs could hear him.

Sir Reyes said, "If something's wrong, you use your words. You're not a baby anymore." He sighed again, even louder. "You can go now."

Isla nodded. She hurried to her seat to collect her bags. Before heading to the door, she thought to say 'thank you're or 'good day', but all that came out was "mmmmm" which made Sir Reyes sigh.

Isla ran outside, almost sure Sir Reyes was still sighing.

As she ran down the hall, she held her hands to her chest and flapped them. She didn't know wether or not Li and Bo had gone to the treehouse, but she decided to go anyway.