accismus | nat x reader x wanda

3

[y/n]'s POV

As I stood in the alleyway outside of my job, I began to question my life choices. 

Did they find out? Did they track me down. 

I think I just fell onto my knees. I honestly don't know. 

My breathing got heavier. 

Am I...?

No. No way.

My hand slaps over my mouth to muffle to sob threatening to escape.

That hasn't happend since...

No! I don't want to think about that right now. I moved on from that a long time ago. A long, lond time ago.

Did someone just scream? Oh shit. I think that was me. Damn, that sounded guttural.

I think I hear the door open behind me.

"Oh my god" someone speaks.

I feel someones hands go around me. I struggle.

"[y/n]" 

Florence?

I go limp.

"Yeah. It's me." 

Did I say that out loud?

"I-I-I-" I'm trying to speak but words are refusing to leave my throat. God this is annoying.

Florence craddles me in her arms, slowly letting us both down further to the ground. I feel water running down my face. 

Oh wait, I think i'm actually crying.

"Shhhhhh, It's okay." She comforts me with a mom-like voice. 

"I-I'm so s-s-sorry" I get out between ugly sniffles. 

This is embarrasing but I can't seem to move my limbs. 

We sit there for what feels like hours, Florence whispering comforting words into my ears and me ugly crying in between hiccups and chokes.

Finally I calm myself down and slowly pull myself away from her shoulder.

"Flo.." I begin to apologize, but she doesn't let me.

"It's okay. You don't need to explain yourself." She smiles lightly. 

I truly don't deserve you.

I can't remember the last time I had panic attack. I guess the stress from this months rent being due soon, thinking the avengers were coming to kill me, and the fact that my dad...well...still exists, was just all too much. 

I slowly get up and lend a had to Florence. 

"How long?" I ask, keeping my head down in embaressment. 

God i wish i wasn't so easily embarassed. 

"It was only, like, ten minutes. We're fine." She responds in a gentle tone that makes me feel like a child and goes ahead of me to get the door. "Besides, you should go home anyway."

I respond immediately after she suggested i go home, "No!" startled by the harshness of my own voice, i try to explain further," I mean...I can't go home."

She stops walking, slowly turns around, and looks at me with a serious look, "[y/n], seriously, you need a break. you're putting too much pressure on yourself. I'll cover your shifts, kay? You deserve the day off."

"No, Flo, I-I mean I appreciate it! I really, really do. But I need the hours. " My voice grows quieter. 

Unspoken words: I need the money!! Not all of us are rich trustfund kids who don't even have to work a job but still choose to for some reason!!

God, [y/n], you're mean. 

She doesn't verbally respond, settling for a nod and a sigh, and contiues walking. 

When we make it back inside, I notice the seats once occupied by the famous heros now abandoned. 

They probably left because i'm incapable of doing my job correctly. 

...

We go back to work without speaking a word to eachother. my muscle memory takes over as i get lost in my thoughts, simultaniously completing orders like a robot.

I hope Florence isn't mad at me. This is, what, the second time I've had a breakdown at work? And before you ask, No! We're not talking about the first one.

Sometimes, I think Florence and I are platonic soulmates. I mean, sure it's rare. But I swear she's always there for me when I need her. And to be honest? I don't even know why! It's not like I was extremely nice to her when we met or anything, we just sort of...clicked right away. Even though I've only known her for, uhhh, two years or so, it feels like we've known each other our whole lives. It sounds stupid i know. Don't make fun of me.

And, as far as i know, she doesn't have an actual soulmate. Well, not one she's ever told me about. But, to be fair, she doesn't know about my soulmates either. Oh yeah. That's right baby, I have two soulmates.

I don't think I've addressed this with you yet, so let's just get this over with because it feels awkward to talk about. Idk..like...there's two people out there that are made for me? Just me? 

Okay this is getting off topic. 

So my marks showed up when I was fifteen. Yeah. That was the first red flag I completely ignored. In case you're unfamiliar with soulmarks, they show up when you turn sixteen. Always. There's never, ever, been a known case where they show up earlier or later than your sixteenth birthday. The second red flag I brushed off was the fact that I had, not only one soulmark, but two of them. 

At first i was like: "Oh woooow that's soooo cool i have two instead of one". And it was cool. Until i did my own research and found out that absolutely    n o b o d y    had more than one soulmark. 

And to this? 

I started getting very concerned. I thought I was a weirdo freak, and so I never showed a single soul (ha i'm funny laugh) the soulmark of a GUN on my ribcage. I always just pretended like I had one, the stars/planets on my ankle. I have yet to find my soulmates. And honestly, I'm scared to.

My father and my mother were soulmates. And seeing what happened to him after she died? I don't think i would ever be capable of going through that.

So for now, i've just decided to ignore my soulmarks and hope i never run into my soulmates. i know, this sounds like a foolproof plan right, lol. And you know what? i think finding them would just cause unnecessary drama in my already stressful life.

Speaking of stressful, I'm pretty sure i need to pick up a second job so I can pay my rent. 

__________________________________________

a/n

hope you all are having a great day/night!

question of the day- what's your favorite animal?

as always, hope you're enjoying the story. If you're re-reading you might notice a lot of changes and that's because i'm currently rewriting this because tbh it was trash and the plot was progressing way too fast.

love you guys always

1076 words

-anastasiya