(revamped) Y/N magne the incubus of hell

C.H.E.R.U.B

[The episode opens up to a shot of Heaven’s golden gates. The gates open and “Cherub Towne” is shown. Cletus flies in front of the screen.]

Cletus: Well, howdy! I’m Cletus! Welcome to Heaven! Guess you did something good to get here, and good people deserve to give loved ones special blessings!

C.H.E.R.U.B. Jingle:

Collin (sings): Does it make you want to cry

[Scene cuts to a man jumping out of an airplane without a parachute. He splats onto a rock while a censoring cloud bubble reads “Owie!”]

Keenie (sings): When your loved one has to die?

[Another person gets run over by a speeding train as “Oh No!” appears in a thought bubble.]

Cletus (sings): Does it hurt you through and through

[Scene goes to another man who accidentally shoots himself in the face with a gun. “Oopsie!” is seen in another thought bubble.]

All (sings): When your face is turning blue?

[Clip shows a struggling man’s face turning blue in a hangman’s noose]

Collin (sings): Well luckily for you…

[Collin poses]

Keenie (sings): There’s something we can do…

[Keenie poses]

Cletus (sings): We can help keep them alive…

All (sings): You so can watch them thrive!

[All three pose together]

All (sings): ‘Cause here at C.H.E.R.U.B.

[The orange C.H.E.R.U.B. logo appears with a registered trademark symbol.]

Collin (sings): We’ll save your honey bun from dying violently

[Cletus rescues a woman from a pack of wild animals. Keenie pushes a sacred Collin in front of them, as he holds a plank of wood with a nail in it.]

All (sings): ‘Cause here at C.H.E.R.U.B.

[The C.H.E.R.U.B. logo appears again]

Keenie (sings): No we never even ask a fee

[Cletus is shown waving a dismissive hand at a person handing him dollar bills]

Collin (sings): Because good people spread the love

[Collin and Keenie give each other a hug in a yellow heart background]

Keenie (sings): And we’re here for all above

[Small hearts of light spread out around a spinning Earth in space]

Cletus (sings): We do the paperwork for you

[A stressed Collin rapidly writes on piles of paper in an office]

Collin (sings): And the heavy lifting, too

[Keenie lifts a boulder from a flattened woman, who gives her a thumbs up.]

Cletus (sings): So sit right back…

[The three Cherubs comfort a battered bleeding man in a car crash]

All (sings): And let us bless a soul, for you!

[The three Cherubs appear back on the screen and sing in harmony. They pose some more.]

Oh we are the C.H.E.R.U.B.!

[The Cherubs appear on a small old fashioned TV. Blitza explodes the TV with a revolver.]

Millie: Nice one, B!