"I met her on the plane" Kian Lawley #Wattys2015

Chapter 7

***trigger warning, this chapter can include self harm, depression & other stuff like that, if your not familiar with reading about things like that pleas skip this chapter, xxx"

Alexia's pov

I came home & checked the picture Kian posted I immediately looked through the comments. & there they were, even tho I know that all these comments aren't true I still believed them.

All these memories from the past came back & I just couldn't keep it inside anymore. I ran up to my room & locked the door so Chantel or anyone else wouldn't come in.

I fell to the floor & started crying. It all was true. All these comments just run trough my mind telling me that Kian deserve someone better & that I'm worthless. & the one that I know I will never forget. That I should die.

I quickly found my little box I kept under my bed. & there it was, my best friend, the one & only who was always there for me when no one else were, my razor.

I went to the bathroom & locked the door incase someone opens the other door to my room. & as fast as I locked the door I slide down the door & the relief started.

"One cut here, one cut there, not that anyone will care" I slowly said to myself while I was making deep cuts on my thighs & my arm.

After I was done I turned the shower on to clean myself up, because I haven't realized how much blood I actually lost until I was done.

After I was done showering I cleaned my cuts & bandaged my thighs & my arm.

I than went to my room & put some boyfriend jeans on because I didn't wanted to wear tight skinny jeans when I had cuts there, & a sweatshirt so my arm wouldn't show.

I heard a knock on my door & turned around to go open it

"Hey, what are you doing?" Chantel asked

"Um just chilling you know" I said a little bit unsure of what she would say

"Are you okey?" She asked

"Yeah I'm fine" I quickly answered looking down on my feet

"I don't think you realize I am a girl & I know when you're lying, what is it?" She asked & we both say on my bed

"Well I just don't feel good today, just a bad day, it will go over" I said even tho I knew it wouldn't

Someone rang on the doorbell, "it's probably Kian, he wanted to take me to the Hollywood sign" I said & started walking

I looked back at Chantel before I went out of my room & the only thing she said were "We're not done yet, I'm gonna talk with you later, but now go & have fun" she said smiling

I went down & there he was. The boy that didn't deserve me, I feel so guilty for making him fall in love with me when he could be with a beautiful girl right now, but instead he chose me. We went to the car & he started driving to the Hollywood sign.

***skip the car ride***

We arrived to the Hollywood sign & we both say down on a cliff to se the city at night. It was so beautiful at this time of the day.

Then I felt Kian's hand on my tight & I felt how it still hurt. I think he noticed something was wrong

"Is something wrong?" He asked

"No everything's fine" I said with a fake smile plastered to my face

"I know something's wrong, pleas tell me" he said with a worried look

"Okey, um well IHaveCutsOnMyTights" I said fast hoping he couldn't hear

"Alexia why would you do that, can you pleas show me?" He said gently hugging me

"Well I just let the hate get to me, & yes you can se it but not here" I said looking up to him, I could se the sadness in his eyes

"It's all my fault, if I haven't posted the picture you wouldn't have done that, it's all my fault" he said with tears in his eyes, I started crying too

"It's not your fault, pleas don't cry" I said kissing him. "Now let's go home" I said grabbing his hand & leading him home

***agin skip the car ride***

"Wait here & I will change into some shorts so I can show you" I said going into the bathroom

When I came out of the bathroom I still had the bandages on

"Okey are you sure you really wanna se it" I asked nervous

"Yes, it's all my fault" he said still with sadness in his eyes

"Okey here we go" I took the bandages off & just stood there in the middle of my room

Kian came closer to me & got on his knees crying, I started to cry too because I don't like seeing him like this

"Alexia..." He said

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A/N so I stopped this chapter here so it can get a little more interesting, & I will keep writing on this in the next chapter like a part 2 of this one or something

~So what do you think Kian will say/do now after he saw the cuts?

~Tell me what you think I should change/make better in/with this story?

~Do you like it so far?

xxxx