Wrong Number?

8:47 pm

Peter: Ned, how do I heal a gunshot wound?

???: I think You have the wrong number.

Peter: Oh sorry

Peter: Do you know how to clean a bullet wound

???: Umm yeah, was it through and through or is the bullet still in. Was it a graze or deeper?

Peter: Through and it is kind of a mix of both but I'm not bleeding a lot

???: Keep pressure on the wound. You will need a needle and some thread, sterilize them with alcohol. Once you stop bleeding clean the wound with something. Use the needle and thread to stitch up the wound, don't cross the stitches because then your skin will tear. Once you finish lightly clean the wound but make sure not to tear the stitches.

Peter: Thanks, you know you know a lot about how to clean gunshots.

???: In my line of work I get shot a lot

Peter: What do you do

???: If I told you that id have to kill you

{Peter changed ???'s name to "Badass"}

Badass: Really?

Peter: :)

{Badass changed Peter's name to "Annoying"}

Badass: :)

Annoying: touche

Badass: I gtg. talk to you later.

Annoying: Wait. How do I know you aren't a creepy pedo

Badass: I promise I'm not a pedo. I just want to make sure that your wound heals right since I doubt you are going to get actual medical help and the way you are talking sounds like you are underage so I'm concerned.

Annoying: Okay that seems reasonable. TTYL.

Badass: Bye. Make sure to clean your wound in the morning.

Annoying: I will 'mom'

{Annoying changed Badass's name to "Mom"}

Natasha smiled at her phone and put it back in her pocket. She then turned back to the breakfast she was cooking for the other avengers. That had been her job ever since moving into the tower since none of the other avengers could cook at all.

"Did the stone-faced Natasha Romanoff just smile," Tony jokes.

"Contrary to popular belief I do have emotions."

"Oh, snappy today. Are you going to share what has you so happy?"

"I'd tell you but then I'd have to murder you," Natasha deadpans staring him menacingly in the eyes

"Please don't do that it will be a PR nightmare," Pepper says entering the room.

"I'm hurt," Tony says holding his hand to his ark reactor, "I can't believe that you don't want me to die because it would be a PR nightmare."

"Well, why else would I care," Pepper says fining innocence.

"I don't know maybe because you love me, or because we have a child together, or because we are married, or becau-" Pepper cuts him off

"Okay, okay I get it I would be sad if you died."

Pepper kisses his cheek and walks out of the room with Tony following behind like a sad puppy. Natasha then goes back to the breakfast quickly taking the eggs, pancakes, french toast, toast, croissants, and a few other Russian pastries out of the oven or off of the stove and set them on the counter before asking Friday to call everyone into the kitchen to get their food before heading to the training room.