riptides//eret x reader [DISCONTINUED]

2

TW:sh, body dysmorphia

Yesterday was a very eventful day. Eret was on my stream, eret checked up on me, it just helped boost my confidence. Eret has been the only person that could calm me down for a long time. His streams and chat were so comforting and were so accepting. Each day I was so excited to see him go live. Last night he didn't go live I noticed as I check my phone notifications. Instead it was a Twitter post.
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The_Eret

Sorry I didn't go live last night guys! I was busy helping someone out and should be going back to my regular schedule today!
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I knew who he was talking about; it was me. I felt a bit bad because other people had to miss out on a stream because of me. It was going to be them wearing a strawberry dress and loads of people were so excited for this stream. I tried to think of other things like Eret has done this many times in the past. He was a very sweet, understanding person and would die for anyone of his friends, family, and fans. He was very selfless and gave many things away. This is why he was able to build a strong community where people feel loved and safe on his streams and together.

I was still laying in my bed when I decided to watch Tik tok for a bit. I saw a few small streamers boosting their twitch accounts on here and decided I would give it a shot as well. I already had a bit of a following on twitch and four random ones on Tik tok. I knew Eret was a bit active on Tik tok but don't know how much. A few months back he was commenting on every video on his for you page. I click on the red plus button on the bottom on my screen and go over to desk. I brush my hair so. I don't look much of a mess and turn on my ring light. I decided I would just improv on it so I clicked the three second countdown.

"Hey Tik tok! Yes another streamer on your for you page looking for some new people. I already have a bit of a following on twitch but I would love to meet new fans! I post Minecraft, drawing, and so much more! So if you would like to see some of that content please stop by! My twitch is linked on my profile so I don't mind you checking it out!" I end the video and check through it. I add my twitch username, u/n, in white text in the corner. I then go to the next page and put in a few hashtags; #twitch #smallstreamer #fyp.

I click publish on the video and watch it load on my following page to 100%. I close my phone and hop out of my bed to go downstairs and make breakfast. I go to open the fridge and feel the cold breeze. I grab the carton of eggs and bacon taking out two eggs from the pack two slices of bacon from its pack. I put the rest of the eggs and bacon back in the fridge closing the cold breeze away. I grab a pan and spread some butter on it so the eggs do not stick to the pan. I heat up the pan watching to butter melt away. I crack both eggs in the pan and watch them sizzle. I sprinkle on some salt, pepper, and garlic on the eggs then I flip them both over. I put the seasonings on the other sides and flip them back over to check if they were done. I took the eggs off the pan and placed them on a plate. I then placed both slices of bacon on the pan and let them burn a small bit then flip them both other. I let it burn just a bit again and put the bacon on my plate.

I walk over to the table with my plate with my food in hand. I quickly eat my food so I can go on discord and see what my server is up too. I have about 5 current mods that are on my discord and help with the streams while having the bots as well. As I finish my food, I stand up and put my plate in the sink. I go back to my room, sit at my desk, and put on my headphones. I turn on my computer monitor and hop on to discord to check my friend requests. Every morning I check because I do get some and I noticed a friend request from someone I knew; it was Eret. I was surprised and but still accepted it wondering why he friended me. We only had those two interactions but if he wanted to friend me on discord I'm fine with it. I go over to Twitter and see that he also followed me back there as well.

After letting the Tik tok sit for a bit, I decided to check up on it; it had about 3 thousand views. I look at the top of the comments knowing not to go to far in case of hate. All the ones I saw on the top were very sweet and supportive and I saw someone who caught my eye; it was again Eret. Eret has been finding be everywhere for some odd reason. "Keep up the great work, y/n!" Was what the comment said. This person was a huge inspiration and role model for me and many other people. Him finding me everywhere put a smile on my face. It was the small remarks that made me happy. He gave me a reason to keep fighting even if he isn't know it. He gave so much to people wanting nothing in return.

I got distracted on Tik tok noticing I have been scrolling for an hour. I closed the app and realized I needed to shower. I grab some clothes; a hoodie, shorts, and fluffy socks. I go into the bathroom, grab a towel, and turn on the hot water. I hesitantly get undressed trying not to look in the mirror to not trigger my body dysphoria. I place the towel on the sink's counter and accidentally see myself. I quickly look away to not trigger anything but the image flashes in my head. I go into my shower so I can quickly get it over with and noticed something shine in the corner. I move closer to it and automatically know what it is. I pick it up and fight the urge but then give in. I placed the red lines all across my arm as the blood drips down. I feel the sting as the hot water hits the cuts, mixing with the blood. Tears start to flow down my face realizing what I had done. I was at a month clean and just messed it all up. I cleaned the mess off my arm and give up trying to shower. I get out the shower and treat the cuts.

I dry off with tears still forming in my eyes. I put my clothes on and dry off my hair by scrunching it with a towel. I walk back over to my bed and sit there staring at my wall. I then get a notification on my phone from discord. I use the Face ID on notice it is from eret "how are you doing? I hope you have a better day then yesterday day! <3" is what they typed to me. The thing is today has not been going to best. This time I was going to be honest with him the first time. I don't want to vent to him but just don't lie to her.

You:hey Eret! Well my day has not been going the best and I have relapsed after a month

Eret: I'm so sorry to hear that, y/n. You have a load of things going on that I have seen. Do you go to therapy because if you don't I really recommend with the situation you seem to be in

You: no I don't I have been thinking of asking my dad at some point this week

Eret: well that good! Please update me on that when you have a chance y/n

You: I will try too! Well I think I will take a nap to recharge before your stream tonight

Eret: alright! Self care is important! Have a good rest y/n <3

You: thank you Eret!

I put my phone onto my desk making sure to close discord up. I lay in my bed and slide under the blankets. I grab my stuffed bear and slowly drift off.

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