Nyctophilia

Chapter 3

The Night I Lost You
Later that night Ethan brought me home. When we walked in my mom wasn't home nor Tadeo. I call my mom and ask her ¨where are you and Tadeo?¨ She says ¨I went out with Lucy and Tadeo is with his friends.¨Ethan is standing behind me on his phone. I turned around to hang up and looked up at him and told him ¨well my mom is out with her friends and so is Tadeo so we have the house to ourselves.¨ He smirked looking up from his phone. Me biting my lower lip tacking a deep breath looking up at him. He tells me ¨so... what should we do?¨ I tell him gazing into his eyes ¨lets watch a movie.! He agrees and we sit  down on my cream couch. Me grabbing the remote control and turning on the Tv. I put a white fluffy blanket on Ethan and I.He put his hand on my thigh and I smiled putting my head on his muscular shoulder. I hear a knock on the door ¨Ethan about to get up. I put my hand on his shoulder signaling him that I got it. I walk towards the white front door and I open it. As I see Alexander barely being able to hold himself up or how drunk he was he says "miss me?" As I see Ethan at the corner of my eye walking towards Alexander I, I grab Alexander and put his white arm on my shoulder.Unexpectedly Ethan helps me and grabs ALexander's other hand. We walked over to the couch and we set him down. I walk to the kitchen and Etan followers. I tell Ethan "I don't know what the hell he's doing here." Ethan tells me clenching his jaw "who is he! Mhm?!" As I flinch from how loud his voice is. He realized and told me "did you just? You know i would never hit you right? Never." I nod my head and say "he's my ex. His name is Alexander." He looks down pinching the bridge of his nose. I walk away to Ethan and towards alexander. I sit next to him and tell him "what are you doing here?" He looked at me with tears in his eyes and meant it "because I miss you, I miss us."I looked down and up at Ethan. And Ethan storms out. I follow letting the door slam behind me. I shout "Ethan!" He turns around and says "go with the guy that misses you so much!" I catch up to Ethan and grab his musculant hand. I pull him towards me and tell him "listen i called him my ex for a reason...because i'm with you know and no one could ever take that away from me." "He was my first love. I can't just walk away from a relationship that I cherished." He looks at me with his tongue pushed up against his cheek and says "you obviously still love him." I tilt my head with a lonely tear falling down face and i say taking a deep breath "that night at the party when i saw your car i realized that i shouldn't have been worrying about Alexander i should been worrying about you so i did and i feel in love with you because i knew that my happy place was with you." He sighs and wipes the tears off my face and says "goodbye V" and walks off to his gray BMW. I start sobbing and go inside. When I go inside, Alexander is on my cream couch wiping off my tears. I grabbed him by his arm and I put it on my shoulder. I walked to his suburban farm house and put in the code.I knew it because well i was his girlfriend. I lay him on his couch and leave.As I walk up the stairs barely being able to see due to the tears in my eyes. I drop onto my bed feeling hopeless,empty, and pain. Ethan had been the first guy that showed me what it felt like to be loved back. Yes i said i loved Alexander but i knew that he didn't feel the same. He was always distant,druck,ruthless, and careless.Ethan showed me what love was supposed to be like. The night that Alexander an i broke up as the night my dad passed away. Alexander and I went to visit my dad together because my dad wanted to meet Alexander. So Alexander and i flew out.That night and my dad went out to go get us pizza. I got a call from his phone and when I picked up it was a policeman and he said "your dad has been in an extremely bad accident head over to the hospital closer to your house." I look at Alexander with tears in my eyes saying "ok" to the policeman.Alexander nods at me and says "what's up?" I say hanging up "my dad got into a car accident and he's in the hospital." Alexander told me with fear "come on let's go!" I agree when I get into the car I text my mom and tell her Me:mom dad got in a car accident come asap i'm going to need you. Mom:I'm on my way honey! Me:ok i'm scared mom. Mom:dont be coming. Alexander put his hand on my shoulder and looked at me and said "He will be ok." When we got to the hospital I ran inside and to the receptionist and asked her "my dad hes here his name is Ezequal."  The receptionist says typing into her computer "he's in surgery right now but he will be out in 10 minutes." I say ok and I see Alexander in the waiting room worried. I walk to the waiting room and tell him "he's in surgery he'll be out in 10 minutes." He nods looking down on the floor. I sit next to him biting my nail and crossing my legs shaking my leg. Alexander puts his hand on my leg and says "everything will be ok love." I look at him and my lips curve into a smile, a fake one but a smile. I got a text from my mom Mom:I got a flight and I'm going to the airport right now. Me ok. I put my phone on my lap and my hand on my chin and try to hold in my tears but they come out pouring. Alexander stands me up and hugs me tightly. I say to him "I'm so scared" he pats my back. The doctor come up to me and says "Veronica Brown daughter of Ezequal Brown'' I put my head up from Alexander warm arms and say "me thats me." he looks at me and says " your dad is in critical health he won't make it through the night i advise you to spend as much time as possible with him i'm so sorry." Everything goes silent and I nod staring at him. My vision goes blurry and I snap out of it and say to the doctor "wait!what room is he in?" he says "patient room 304" I say "ok thank you" And run toward the room i kneel down and say ¨hi dad,how are you?¨ I put my hand in his and turned to Alexander and told him ''I can't say goodbye ''I turned back to my dad and said ¨I love you so much papa." ¨You stay with me ok you hold on i love you more than life itself and i can't lose you.¨ I put my head down and I felt a squeeze on my hand. My dad had squeezed my hand. I put my head wiping away my tears and told him "hi papa" "hi mija" he tells me looking at me with a slight smile. "I love you so much you know?" i tell him "i know my love i love you too."  Closing his eyes and fixing his head making sure he was comfortable. I get up laying next to him sobbing. Once I lay down next to him he grabs my arm and squeezes it. "Mija no matter what happens remember nothing is ever going to be good enough for anyone." "You do not need anyone's validation except you own." He says to me lifting my face with his warm hand "I love you and Tadeo so much tell him I love him for me ok?" I tell him I know and ok stroking his brown hair. We lay there for 10 min and I felt his hand fall and the motion beep. I yell "HELP MY DAD HELP" the doctors come rushing in putting me aside and Alexander hugging me. They cover my dad with the white polyester blanket and the doctors say "time of death 21:37." I fall down to my knees and feel as if someone ripped a part out of me. The doctor tells me "say your last goodbyes we will take him soon." I nod, get up and walk towards the hospital bed and say "good-" I cover my mouth. Alexander walks up behind me wiping his tears with the back of his hand and says "goodbye Mr.Brown" i look at him shaking my head back and forth biting the side of my cheek. Alexander nods and I say " Goodbye papa I
love you so much." Alexander and I walked  out of room 304. We sat in the waiting room.I felt sick,weak,hopeless and numb. 2 hours passed and saw my mom and tadeo at the front desk and I yelled "mom!" Running toward me my mom says "mija where's your dad how is he?!" I tell her with a sad look and look down"mom..." she says "mija...dont...no...he..." "I'm so sorry-" my voice breaks. She covers her mouth and Tadeo hugs her. I turn around to see Alexander gone. I run outside and I see him talking on the phone. He said "I can't break up with her right now her dad just died. I'm sorry babe see you later love you." I Tell him crossing my arms "Alexander, who are you calling babe and why can't you break up with me?" He says tilting his head "it's not what it looks like." "no no go on break up with me be an asshole you already cheated on and said goodbye to my dad so go ahead." I say holding back my tears. He says trying to grasp onto my arm "I'm sorry but I have been wanting to talk to you." I say to Alexander, "Alexander, I loved you. I brought you to see my dad. I did so much for you and not once did I leave even though I wanted to break up ." "So you're telling me you have been wanting to break up with me" he says, holding back his tears. "Yes sometimes because you never made me feel loved,protected,appreciated,happy" "but yet i still stayed with you because I- loved you but i guess we know who didnt love me" I tell him hurt. "I'm so sorry for your dad,for me hurting you, for everything, I love Veronica. You are beautiful,smart,funny,brilliant,and so much more but it's over" Alexander said breaking me. "Alexander i hope you know your a selfless asshole that only cares for your well being get the fuck out of my life." I tell him in an angry voice. "Veronica I- '' Alexander says''What '' mh''go talk to the hoe that doesnt know she has a whole ass boyfriend of a year in a half." I walk telling Alexander. When I get to the door I start crying. I felt betrayed.I wiped my tears and went inside. I see my mom on the phone with my grandma and Tadeo laying on her shoulder. My mom sees me and says "Mija?!where were you?" {Translation}:Daughter. "Ama me and Alexander just broke up" I tell her crying. She says telling my grandma "perate ama Verónica y su novio quebraron." {Translation}: "Hold on mom Veronica and her boyfriend broke up." I say to my mom "he was on the phone with another girl calling her babe and saying he loves her." "what?!that bastard" my mom telling me, hugging me. Tadeo rubbing my back he said "he didn't deserve you sister." I say putting my head up "mom i wanna go home" she says "we will once i sign the paperwork." My mom and dad were barely splitting up the night before my mom had signed the paperwork of a divorce. Later that night we went back to my dad's house and I went straight to his bed and layed on it.It still smelled like him still.Tadeo came in and said "can i come in?" I said "yes" , whipping the salty tears of my soft face.He lay next to me and said "i'm going to miss him." I tell tadeo looking into his eyes "he told me to tell you that he loved you." Tadeo starts crying "I cant believe that he's gone." That night my mom,tadeo and I slept in my dad's bed. The next day we left Santa Monica California. To Michigan.