Oh My God (Homework Sequel)

I'm Searching For A Signal, Holding Out My Phone

"Hamilton, can you answer the question?"

I look up at my professor with wide eyes. I wasn't paying attention. I had zoned out without even realizing it.

"Um.. I'm sorry, could you repeat the question?" I ask timidly.

"In the court of law, that would be seen as incompetence. No one is going to want to listen to your arguments if you can't pay attention." She scolds. "Kinloch?"

"Um, that would be malum in se." Francis says, glancing over at me. "It's an action that's wrong or evil in itself."

"Good. Maybe you should learn something from your friend here, Hamilton." The professor says before turning back to the board. She continues her lecture and Francis gives me a concerned look. I just shake my head at him.

After class was over, he stopped me before I could get to my next class. "Hey, is everything alright?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" I ask.

"Maybe because you weren't paying attention in class. That's not like you at all." He says.

"I'm fine, Francis, I promise. I wouldn't have gone back to my place if I wasn't." I offer a smile, but he doesn't seem to buy it.

He sighs softly. "It's just.. It's already been two weeks. Maybe you should talk to-"

"No, I don't want to." I shake my head, lying completely. "We just need to move on, I can't just run right back to him."

"It's not running back to him, it's talking to him." He tells me. "You guys should talk things through, because right now neither of you know what's going on between you two."

"What do you mean? I know exactly what's going on."

"Do you? Are you guys broken up? Are you on break? Are you still together just living separately right now?" He asks. "Are you ready to start seeing other people? Do you want him moving on, or are you ready to get back together-?"

"Okay, so maybe I don't have everything figured out. But I need to find that out on my own, don't I?" I ask.

He shrugs. "I don't know, but you can't let it affect your work. You should figure this out quick, or you'll get so far behind in school." He tells me.

I sigh and nod slowly. "Okay, I'll give it some thought." I look at my phone. "I'd better get to my next class.. See you later."

"See you later, Alex." He waves and we part ways.

I look at my phone and click on blocked contacts. I hover over John's name for a few moments before closing out of the app and putting my phone away. I had class to attend.

Timeskip brought to you by thinking it would kill me but, it didn't.

I walk into my apartment, closing and locking the door behind me. I set down my keys and bag on the counter and see Peggy sitting on the couch in the livingroom. She was on the phone with someone.

"Oh, Alex just got home." I hear her say as I walk towards the livingroom.

"Hey, Pehhy. Who are you on the phone with?" I ask, though I didn't really want to know.

"Um, it's John." She says. The other side of the phone was quiet. He was probably listening for my response.

I bite the inside of my cheek and nod. "Alright, I'll be in the other room, then." I say, hearing her sigh as I walk into my bedroom.

I close the door and lean against it, still trying to listen in.

"You just need to give him time, I'm sure he'll come around eventually." Peggy says.

I can't exactly hear what John responded with, but I did hear his voice and it made my heart sink. I missed hearing his voice so much.

Maybe I should invite him to lunch or something. We really should talk things through. I didn't let him say anything when I threw him out.

I sigh and walk to my bed, plopping down on it. There was no hope for me. Maybe I should just let him go and focus on my studies. That's what Francis did, and he seems pretty happy.

But I'm not happy. I was happy with John. Until we started school.

I groan loudly and stare up at the ceiling. After a minute or two, Peggy knocks on the door and comes in. "Hey, you alright?"

"Ding ding ding, question of the day." I say sarcastically.

"I'm worried about you, Alex. You don't seem to be handling this very well." She says.

"Let me guess, you want me to talk with him as well?" I ask, slightly annoyed.

"Well, no, not if you don't want to. I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Well.. I'm not.." I admit. "I keep trying to be, but I'm not."

She sits next to me and I sit up, sighing softly. "I miss him. Is that bad?"

"No, it's not bad at all. It's normal." She sighs. "Look, I've known John for a very long time, but I honestly never thought he could do something like this.. I mean yeah, in high school he was kind of like this, but I thought once he was actually committed, he would stay loyal."

"People don't change that much." I say. "And he still doesn't think what he did was wrong."

"That's not true."

I raise an eyebrow at her. "What do you mean?"

"Well, we were talking just now, and he finally gets it. He feels awful, he finally realized exactly why it hurt you. He told me he would do anything just to tell you he's sorry." Peggy explains.

I look at her. "But I don't want him to apologize. I don't know how I'd respond."

"Well, that's up to you." She says.

"If I forgive him, I'm just setting myself up to get hurt again. But if I blow up at him again, we'll probably never get back together. And I can't just say nothing.." I groan. "I don't even know what I want anymore. I don't want him back, but at the same time I so desperately just want him here."

"You need time to figure it out. Give yourself that time." She advises. She was pretty good at giving advice for still being in high school.

Before I could respond to her, there was a knocking at the door. I tilt my head. "Are you expecting anyone?" I ask.

"I was going to ask you the same question." She says, standing up. "It's probably just Ange, she told me she was going to randomly check up on me."

I nod. "Oh, alright. Go and let her in, then."

She nods and leaves the room. I can hear mumbling, but can't make out any distinct voices. I sigh and get up, walking out of the room. I hear the voices stop, so I figure they were already gone or something.

"Hey, Peggy, who was at the-"

I freeze when I see him standing there.

"John?"

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