I really really like you (Draco fanfiction)

8.

It has been two weeks since his encounter with the Dark Lord and classes at the wizard school were starting again. 

He dreaded the moment of going back to Hogwarts, he knew he had to tell V, he wouldn't want to lie to her.

Seeing her at Kings Cross station with her bags from home, his heart ached. She smiled when she finally spotted him and ran to give him a huge hug.

"I missed you" she said.

He put his arms around her and hugged her tight, trying not to get sad. He nestled his head in her as he tried not to let his tears slip, he couldn't believe what he got her into.

"I missed you too" he whispered.

When they pulled back he managed to smile and pretend like nothing had happened. They kissed deeply but he felt like he was killing her.

Draco didn't get any sleep. He kept thinking of ways of how he would tell V, but he kept dreading it more and more. He never wanted to hurt her.

The next day was the weekend, so no one had classes. Draco and V decided to take a walk through the woods.

As they were walking, they held hands but Draco's mind seemed to be on something else. V noticed his dark bags under his eyes and how much paler he looked.

"You alright?" she asked him.

He looked at her and gave her a small smile, "Fine" and then looked back ahead. V knew something was wrong. 

They reached a grassy hill with no trees around. The Hogwarts castle was visible for them as grey clouds surrounded the sky.

They both sat down on the ground in their usual positions, V inbetween Dracos legs as Draco had his arms around her.  V held his hands in hers and felt his palms cold and sweaty.

Draco decided to tell her now, "I .. I met with Voldemort".

V closed her eyes. She didn't yell, she didn't jump up in surprise. She didn't do anything but stayed still, holding his hands with her eyes closed. She then became very cold.

"... I became a Death Eater" he silently said.

Tears started to stream through her closed eyes. She shankingly grabbed his left arm and pulled up his sleeve.

She drew a sharp shaky breath when she saw the black Dark Mark on his very own skin. Draco heard her and his heart broke.

She closed her eyes again and pulled his hand to her head and whispered to him, "Why?" 

Draco was tearing. He heard her voice shake when she asked.

"You know I don't have a choice" he said with his own voice cracking.

V then turned and looked at him. He saw her eyes red with tears, he never wanted this for her.

She let go of his grasp, "What do you mean you don't have a choice?" She asked a little harshly.

He swiped his tears off with his hand, "You know the family I come from" he said plainly.

"That doesn't mean anything" she said getting up.

"It means everything!" he yelled. "Everything. You don't understand ... my family knew their whole lives this day would come sooner than any day later" he said looking at her.

"They don't get to choose for you" she said. Draco got up from the ground, shaking his head but she continued. "They don't make the decisions for you, it's your life" she said rather loudly.

"It was never my life. Never. My father made all the decisions for me, all the time. I never even took a breath to realize this was my life, why should this be any different?" he said harshly to her.

"I could only be one thing" he said. "And that one thing, my father took it from me"

"You cannot be one thing" she said. Tears were still coming out.

"Oh please!" he cried out. "Everyone sees the one thing in me! They see evil. If anything else, they see a horrible, self centered little boy!" he said.

"Just like that day, when you beat up that guy, he saw what everyone else did in me, weakness, it's one or the other and I'm still being kicked to the ground ... that's how I'm seen".

He turned away from her and put his hands on the back of his neck in frustration.

"I never did" she said quietly. His head raised to the sky. "I never did" she said again shrugging.

He then turned back and quickly walked up to her, angrily "You cannot tell me that you never thought I was the bad kid walking around these halls! The kid that never cared for anyone but himself!"

"Until I met you!" She yelled. "I didn't know the real you until I got to know you!" She yelled back at him, pointing her finger rather harshly at him, trying to make him understand. 

"You are not one thing. You may be cunning and mysterious, fine. But you are smart .. strong, funny .. and kind" he rolled his eyes at the last part.

"Others don't see that because you don't show them. And you're too afraid to do that" she said looking at him.

He looked up at her with a saddened expression.

"If you could just make this one choice for yourself .. maybe you can" she said.

They looked at each other with destroyed expressions. V then turned around and went up the hill, back into the woods to return to the castle.

Draco fell back onto the ground and cried. He sobbed and he hit the grass with his fists in distress. He wailed out in pain. He couldn't hold the heartbreak any longer.