Erase and Rewrite (Dramione)

Process and Clarify

Paralyzed

Like she can't move
or think
or even breathe.

That's how it feels as she sits in the Gryffindor common room.

Around her,
Blaise tries to calmly explain to Ron and Harry what has happened.
Ginny sits in another chair,
looking at the boys but wiping away tears every now and then.
And Theo is trying
and failing
not to make everything worse.

She's barely listening.

Each and every one of them is hanging on the edges of their mental stability.
They have just fought a war,
lost so many loved ones,
And now they should understand each other.

Harry and Ron should accept that she lied to them,
should believe the Slytherins really are her friends.

And she can't even get out words to speak for their behalf.

The broken faces of the fallen flash in her mind.

She needs him
and he's not here!

"She told us she was saved by some old muggle lady! And now you try to say that it was the ferret all along? Hermione will you please say something?!" Ron fumed.

Deep down in her rational mind she knows Ron is in shock too.
That this is not the time to talk about all this.
This is a time he needs to be with his family,
Him and harry both.
Harry's arms should be around Ginny,
they should...

But she doesn't say anything,

Because she is afraid opening her mouth will only break her more.

She needs something to hold onto,
something to pull her back together.

"Do you really want to do this now Weasley?" Theo spits with such venom even Ginny finches, "Is this really the time!? Look at her! Don't you see she needs time? I'm sure your impatient ass can wait for her to get herself together before you start pressuring! She just got her memories back a few hours ago! And we just fought a war!"

"How can I comfort her if I have no idea what's been going on?"

"Maybe you're not the one who should be comforting her! Maybe you should go be with your family, Weasley!"

She looks up from her haze
and she has never been more grateful for Theo than she is now.

Ron blinks a few times and then storms out.

"Hermione..."

Harry is kneeling before her,
trying to get her to look at him.

"I don't know what's going on, but I wouldn't be alive without Malfoy."

Gently he puts his hand on her cheek and she closes her eyes.

"We talk when you're ready, okay?"

She nods slowly,
but as Harry leaves tears fall through her closed lids.

Alone
that's what she needs to be.
Away from here.

So she gets up
"I need a moment..." She mutters and leaves the room.

The corridors are silent as she climbs up the stairs.

Up
up
All the way to the Astronomy tower.

The night is clear,
she leans to the railing and lets the wind mess her hair.
Tries to breathe.

Never
not even when she had just come back from the dead,
has she felt so utterly lost and hopeless.

All the horror and bloodshed
Baby Teddy Lupin, whose parents are dead.
George Weasley, whose other half has been cut off.
All the families whose children will never come home,
children whose parents will never come home.