Today, I'm writing about you even though I haven't met you yet. I'm thinking about you, yet you're not even my reality yet. But I'm waiting for you. The longer, the better. I've been in relationships before. Though they were epic, they consumed me. So much that when they walked away, it took every ounce of my sanity and strength to pick myself up and rebuild my heart.
I wanted to make it into an impenetrable fortress - one that would protect me from yet another destruction. But then I thought, what if I was also preventing a good thing from coming in? So I changed my mind. Because I wouldn't want to risk missing that chance of finding something wonderful just because I closed myself off.
So I'm here today, waiting. Preparing myself from maybe another heartbreak or the greatest thing to ever happen in my life. I don't mind if it's the former. Because I know that you're out there somewhere still. Soon our paths will collide. And you'll slowly sneak in to my life. You'll take your time and I'll take mine.
It'll be steady and warm. And the feeling will make itself known in a subtle way but it'll be hard to deny and shake off nonetheless.
And when it hits us, it won't feel wrong. It won't be hard to admit, nor will we try to resist. It'll feel like the easiest thing in the world to succumb to. And being with you will be like coming home after a long journey. My soul will feel the relief of the search that has finally ended.
And love, life with you will be wonderful. In time, I'll know how to love you the way that you deserve. I'll know whether or not you like coffee, how you like your eggs, or whether or not you're a morning person. And I will love you regardless.
All those times I have spent in confusion and disappointment will not have mattered anymore because you will be my present and my future. We'll go to the groceries together, and I'll take pictures of you when you're not looking. And I'll spend every single day loving you, in happy times and especially on the hard days.
When you finally arrive, all the songs will finally have meaning. And the yearnings of my heart and soul will finally have a face. Loving you will be the best thing that I will strive to do well. It'll be simple, safe. It'll be sure. Because it'll be you.
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(written during a lonely day in quarantine, no thanks to you COVID)
