Head Over Heart

Chapter Nine

They finally finished the baby fence around the pool. Lexa admired her work for a moment before they cleaned up the yard. Clarke had already started to work on dinner. Lexa was helping her sister load the tools in her vehicle. Luna walked over and ruffled her baby sister's curls before opening the first aid kit Clarke gave them. Anya made a hissing noise as her older sister wrapped her bleeding and blistered hand.

"Next time I'll pay for the damn installation," Anya grumbles

"I second that. I want to be sitting in the lounge chair drinking a beer while someone else does the hard labor." Luna chimes in

"I really appreciate you both helping me today," Lexa says

"Whatever you need Lex. We're just glad you're home..." Luna says

There's a moment of silence before she speaks again

you know we never stopped looking for you." Luna says

"What do you mean?" Lexa asks as her brows furrow

"We signed up for another four tours. Our entire unit did. We spent all those years looking for some sign one way or another." Anya says

"I... I didn't know," she says quietly

"It just didn't feel right coming home without you," Luna says as she pulls Lexa in for a hug

Lexa closes her eyes as a tear slips out of her eye "I'm sorry." she says

"If anyone is sorry it's us for not finding you sooner," Anya says as she joins in the hug

Lexa shakes her head "That's not on you. You just follow the intel you're provided." She says

"How have you been doing?" Anya asks as she and Luna break from the hug

Lexa clears her throat "I'm okay. It's an adjustment obviously." She says

"Alright. Well, you have a phone now so call us if you need anything. Rae will be with you and Madi tomorrow." Luna says

Lexa nods "I should go shower. I have somewhere to be." She says

"Where?" Luna asks narrowing her eyes

"Just meeting up with a friend." She says

"Alright... well have fun," Anya says sharing a puzzled look with her older sister

Lexa waves them off and heads upstairs to shower real quick. She gets dressed quickly and heads downstairs. She grabs the cursed journal and car keys. She hasn't driven a vehicle in years but she figures it should be like riding a bike. Muscle memory. Luckily her bad leg isn't the one she needed to hit the gas or brake.

"Hey, dinners almost rea-" Clarke says but halts when she sees Lexa dressed with car keys in hand

Lexa swallows and puts her hands behind her back

"Where are you going?" She asks softly

"Just meeting up with uh a friend," Lexa says

She doesn't want to tell Clarke about the shrink yet because she's not even sure how it will go. It's their first session. She wanted to wait until she knew she'd continue seeing Becca. She also wasn't quite ready to admit out loud that she was seeing a shrink. It just makes her feel like she is some broken thing that needs fixing.

"Oh okay... are you okay to drive? I can give you a ride." Clarke says

"I'll be okay Clarke. Don't wait up." She says

"Okay. Have fun..." Clarke says as she wraps her arms around herself and stands there awkwardly in the hall looking at her wife.

She hasn't felt awkward in front of her wife before. Lexa seemed reserved and closed off all of a sudden. Something just seemed off about her going to meet up with a friend. She's known Lexa for years. Who is she meeting up with? she knows all of her friends. Maybe she'll just tell me when she's ready? It didn't lessen the pulling at her heart watching her wife walk out their front door. She sighs and heads back to the kitchen to finish cooking the meal she no longer cared to eat.