The Essays I wrote

Shanks on Baudelaire's "Chant d'automne"

Shanks on Baudelaire's "Chant d'automne"

In conjunction with creating my own, admittedly horrendous, translation of "Chant d'automne" by Charles Baudelaire, I found that Lewis Piaget Shanks was able to recreate the poem in the English language best with his specific diction choices, the rhyme scheme, and poetic artistry.

When comparing the different translations of "Chant d'automne" by William Aggeler, Roy Campbell, and Lewis Shanks, Shanks's translation immediately stands out with multiple differences just based on the words he has chosen and how he has chosen to write them. For one, Shanks is the one translator that only capitalizes the word I, names of the month, and a seemingly random word, whereas Aggeler and Campbell capitalize the first word of each line and the first word in the beginning of a sentence. Shanks sticks to noncapitalization to keep the poem in a continuous state of movement and to accentuate important images, which happen to be the months of the year, symbolizing Summer and Autumn, and the narrator himself. For example, "soon we shall plunge 'neath winter's icy pall;/ farewell, bright fires of too-brief July" (Shanks 1-2). He does not capitalize the first word in the entire poem, but the month gets special treatment. Shanks is also the only translator to name specific months of the year instead of sticking to just using the names of the seasons. Shanks shortens words, too. Referring to the previous quote, why use "'neath" instead of underneath or beneath (1,10)? Shanks's translation follows no syllabic meter structure, nor does it mirror the meter of Baudelaire's original version. So, it cannot be for any sort of meter structure, however, it has been used to help with the rhyme scheme pattern and for the poetic artistry in the English language that Shanks seems to be pushing for in his translation. The one seemingly random word Shanks capitalizes can be seen as noun or verb turned name. "once more on me shall winter all unroll:/ wrath, hatred, shivering dread, Toil's cursèd vise,/and like the sun in his far hell, the pole,/ my heart shall be a block of crimson ice" (5-8). This capitalization on a word that means exhausting labor, with a slight connotation to slavery, gives pretty much the hint that this whole poem is about life being such an exhausting piece of work that it can possibly be seen as slavery.

Continuing on, Shanks uses a month to rhyme just once on lines 2-4, "farewell, bright fires of too-brief July!/ even now I hear the knell funereal/ of falling fire-logs in the court close by." Shanks also keeps to Baudelaire's rhyme scheme of ABAB. Aggeler did not bother to rhyme, and I believe that's because Aggeler translated the most literally. In fact, Aggeler's translation was quite similar to mine! And I have zero knowledge on the French language. Therefore, Aggeler offers a too literal translation of "Chant d'automne", which means it lacks the poetic artistry and the deeper meaning that Baudelaire pours down in the poem. Campbell is quite the opposite. Campbell has a rhyme scheme just like Baudelaire and Shanks's translation. However, his poem has a completely different sound, feeling, and meaning from every other translation. I believe he takes the whole recreation of the act of translating a poem to another level.

While Shanks utilizes his artistic talent to recreate and express Baudelaire's "Chant d'automne" in the English language, at least it is comparable to a literal translation of the poem like Aggeler's. Campbell has a translation where the artistic flow has a darker and gloomier feel. So much so, that it seems to stem away from Aggeler's literal translation a bit too far at times. I believe that Campbell's translation of the poem takes the form of Baudelaire's stereotypical grotesque style, just slightly more than Shanks's does. However, the more grotesque the translation is, does not automatically make it is the better translation. Shanks connects the literal translation with the artistic style in a balanced form for the English language. Campbell leans more to an artistic form, while Aggeler is firmly rooted in the literal translation. I find that a balance of both artistry and literal translation equals a better translated poem that gives the same sense, style, meaning, and words from the original poem. Shanks's translation of "Chant d'automne" is the closest one to the balance.

Therefore, using unique diction choices and specific capitalizations, keeping close to the literal translation of Baudelaire's words and the original rhyme scheme structure, and at the same time utilizing his poetic artistry to capture the feeling and meaning for readers of the English language, Shanks gives the best English version of "Chant d'automne".

Works Cited

Aggeler, William. "Song of Autumn." Self Portrait by Charles Baudelaire, /poem/208.

Baudelaire, Charles. "Chant D'automne" Self Portrait by Charles Baudelaire, /poem/208.

Campbell, Roy. "Song of Autumn." Self Portrait by Charles Baudelaire, /poem/208.

Shanks, Lewis Piaget. "Chant D'automne (Autumn Song) by Charles Baudelaire." Self Portrait

by Charles Baudelaire, /poem/208.