It has always been you

Chapter 4

For the next days they were pretty much training every day. Barely a break in-between. Ash got to know her new teammates better and better. Mostly on the field. And boy was she glad they were all on her team. She'd played against a few of them in college teams before but never talked to anyone after.
She also got closer with Ali. They hung out daily. Shopping when they had a few hours off, walks or just hanging out by the pool. Nobody really cared, they all somehow found their best friend on the team.
Ashlyn on the other hand got increasingly anxious. She knew the feelings she had for Ali weren't strictly platonic. She liked her. Little did she know that Ali had similar struggles. Only that Ashlyn knew she was gay since highschool. And she was okay with that. She'd gone through coming out and being bullied and not so accepting family members. She was through with that. She got closer to her family again. They eventually got over her being gay.
Meanwhile Ali just thought she was straight her whole life. Well... She told herself she was.
A week into camp both Ali and Ash were in the pool. They spent about an hour in there with a bunch of girls from the team before leaving the pool and deciding to just sunbathe for a bit.
After a few minutes of silence Ali spoke up: "Ash?"
"Yeah. What?" Ash giggled.
"When did you know you liked girls..?" Ali asked quietly. She didn't want anyone else to hear her. For all they knew she was straight. And she didn't feel it was necessary for her to tell them anything. Not until she figured it out herself at least. Ashlyn on the other hand felt safe for her to turn to. She'd come out to the team during a game of never have I ever. She didn't make a big deal out of it and neither did anyone else. Half of the girls were queer anyway.
"Well... " Ashlyn started thinking. She knew where this was going. Ali was for sure not the first girl who'd asked her that.
"I mean I dated a guy back in highschool just because... I don't know that's what you're supposed to do?" Ashlyn laughed at the memory.
"Well that relationship ended after like a month. Not that I hated him or anything but... I had a crush on a girl a year above me. She was a senior so she left before I ever told anyone but.. god was she gorgeous. And I just never went further than kissing with the guy because honestly... It didn't feel right" she stated.
"Huh" Ali responded. She was getting lost in her thoughts a bit. And Ashlyn could clearly tell but she kept on talking as she felt like she wasn't done telling the story Ali asked for.
"And then there was homecoming my senior year... I went with a bunch of friends. And there was this new girl in my grade that year. We all thought she was a bit weird but she was the first girl I kissed. Well she kissed me but..." Ashlyn trailed off, a grin on her face.
The grin on Ash's face made Ali laugh. She knew exactly what the blonde was alluding to. She wanted to say something but she didn't know what. Or how. She felt like more confused then before but at the same time she wasn't. Ashlyn just assured the feeling that was already there.
"Why you asking?" Ashlyn pulled Ali out of her thoughts.
"I...." Ali began but she didn't say another word for a few seconds. Ashlyn didn't interrupt either since she could tell how nervous Ali was. She knew that feeling. She'd been there. Way too many times for her liking.
"I think I might like girls too" Ali whispered. She looked at Ashlyn scared. She knew there was nothing to be scared of but she couldn't help it.
"Okay." Ashlyn said in the softest tone Ali could imagine. She was smiling at the brunette who soon reciprocated that smile. But small tears soon fell down her cheeks. She felt like everyone but Ashlyn disappeared around her.
Ashlyn of course saw the tears rolling down her best friends cheek and immediately pulled her into a hug. Ali began crying a little more as she sunk into her. She didn't feel scared anymore, just a huge wave of relief.
Ash let her cry it out for a bit until she spoke up again.
"How do you feel?" She asked smiling at Ali.
"Relieved" Ali giggled through her tears. Slowly but surely she was getting her breathing back into a normal rhythm. As she looked around she saw that nobody even noticed her little breakdown. She was glad nobody did.
"Ali,..." Ash started carefully. "Am I the first person you told?"
Ali just nodded and leant into another hug. She stayed in Ashlyn's arms for 5 minutes. She felt weirdly comfortable.
"Can you please not tell anyone?" Ali asked after they'd pulled away.
"Of course Al. This is your thing to tell. I'm not just gonna out you to anyone, okay?" Ash smiled.
"Thank you" Ali answered quietly.
After a few minutes of silence they were approached by Allie.
"Hey pookies. We're gonna get food. You coming?"
With that they both got up and followed Allie.