Don't Put Your Life at Risk for Me

Chapter 4

Javier never asked to fall in love.

Yet here he was laying in bed, wearing his partner's clothes and thinking of all the different ways he could bend him over once his wound healed.

He wasn't even sure what they were to each other at the moment. Javier had kissed him last night with the sole purpose of showing Steve that he did love him, he did accept him, and that he wanted to be with him in whatever way Steve would allow. They hadn't talked about what was going to happen next. Steve was still married and had a kid. Javier didn't know if he was going to give up that part of his life yet or even at all. He could just be Steve's little side piece, and Javier found himself slowly accepting that fate. Of course he wanted to be with Steve intimately, sexually, but if he only wanted him to stay on the side then he would. No matter how much it may hurt. How much it will hurt.

That's what Javier thinks about as he drifts to sleep for the fourth time today. He thinks of Steve's lips and the way his mustache tickles him whenever they kiss. He thinks about the way he pulls on his hair in just the right places that make Javier's brain short-circuit. He thinks of the warmth that traps him when Steve pulls him against his body or holds tightly onto his hand. He thinks about how Steve told him he loved him. He thinks about how Steve may be his, right now, but he only has half of him.

Javier loves more than just half a man.

Love is Steve Murphy, and Javier Peña knows he'll never stop falling.

He feels like he's trapped in a dream. Warm hands caressing his face, smoothing his hair back, and a thumb tracing wide circles just above his hipbone. He feels bathed in warmth and like he's walking through an orchard solely comprised of bergamot oranges. There's lips at his jaw, slow and soft, through whispers of 'I love you'. Those lips stray from their place, trailing up to his cheek to his temple and across his forehead. They come softly down the bridge of his nose and end with a light nibble to the pointed tip. He huffs out a breath, basking in the serenity fizzling through his skin and warming his heart. There's breath just above his own lips that smells vaguely of coffee and a calloused hand brushing across his cheek.

"You absolutely melt me with your beauty Javi. I can't imagine surviving if I were to ever see your sleeping form in the morning sunlight, casting shadows over your features and making your skin glow. It makes me swell just imaging it. Your beauty, none could compare." The lips softy brush his, making the small hairs on the back of his neck stand and his skin tingle. "Now come on sleepy. You better open your eyes for me, or I'll drink your smoothie."

Javier makes a noise in his throat. This is no dream. "Bésame otra vez," he mumbles into the air. His hands come up blindly in search of Steve's face and he hums quietly when his fingers brush against his soft hair. "Por favor." Steve's lips brush his again, just barely, and Javier whines when he evades the kiss. He tries again, scrunching his nose when all he gets is a tickle from Steve's mustache hairs. "No eres justo," he complains. His eyes finally blink open, and he feels his own face break out into a lazy smile upon seeing Steve hovering barely above him with a smug look.

"I'm not fair? I brought you another smoothie and nicely woke you from your sleep. Do you want a bucket of water next time?"

Javier shakes his head with a sleepy frown. "No. No, yo quiero que escupas en mi boca la próxima vez." Javier thinks that either Steve has no idea what he just said, he doesn't care, or he hides his surprise well.

All he does is raise a brow with a little twitch of his upper lip. "Sí?" Javier nods, biting the inside of his cheek, and tries to hide the flush in his face. He's by no means embarrassed for expressing what he wants. "Y ¿qué pasa ahora?"

Javier's eyes widen only slightly as he begins to fail at hiding his blush. "I thought you didn't speak Spanish?"

Steve seizes Javier's cheeks with his hand quickly and aggressively. It almost hurts, the amount of pressure he's using, but Javier finds he enjoys it. "I asked you a question first."