COMFORT PLACE | bang chan.

[ 12 ] stars and swing sets pt. 2

Chan really likes listening to me talk about myself.

He would always constantly ask about me, even after four months of talking every day. He'd ask me how my day was, what I was like when I was younger, what my talents are, what my hobbies are. I realise, even now, that he seems to be really interested in me.

I guess it makes sense, since I already knew things about him way before we even officially met. Like how he used to be a competitive swimmer, or how he likes to work out, and even how he has an adorable dog named Berry. Things like that can't be well hidden when you're famous.

But Chan didn't know anything about me before we met, he didn't know me like how I already knew him, so I understand why he's always constantly asking about me. I don't mind it, actually it's pretty cute, how his eyes shine whenever I tell him something new about me, or how he grins so wide whenever he listens to me talk, or how he compliments me and chimes in whenever he can.

And it's not just him — the feeling is mutual too. I also want to know more about him. The real Chan. And to my pleasant surprise, I have. I've found out about things that I'm pretty sure no one else knows about him. Not big things, but little subtle things that he wouldn't otherwise openly talk about. Like how I realise Chan falls so deep in thought whenever he works, how his eyebrows furrow together in concentration as he plays a few chords on the keyboard of his MIDI, or how he wrinkles his nose whenever he doesn't like how his track is turning out.

How he, as someone who he always speaks English to, mumbles to himself in Korean when he'd do something a bit embarrassing, or how he lets out a real, stomach laugh I've never really heard on camera before, or how he's actually sometimes a little scary whenever the other boys would misbehave a little around him.

Chan has moments like that. After so many months of talking to him, I realise that Chan has let his guard down around me. He's more human, more of a person. He's not someone who I thought was just an idol through a screen anymore, but rather he's more of a man who always greets me in the morning with a smile. He isn't as cautious around me than he would be to a camera, like how he allows himself to show how tired he actually is instead of hiding it now, or how he actually shows how angry or upset he is over something and rant to me about it (and damn, he's kind of scary when he's mad).

But it actually makes me happy when he shows me his vulnerable side. It makes me realise that Chan's grown comfortable around me, and that he doesn't care to let his idol image slip whenever we're on a call. It warms my heart to see him like this.

We're friends now after all.

It's nice little subtle things that I've found out just by observing him, and it would be a lie if I said it didn't make me feel a bit special to be one of the few people who know about his little traits.

I also realise that Chan is a really, really big goddamn flirt.

He has no regrets. Not one single regret. Every single time I talk to him now, he wastes no time calling me angel, he teases me for little things, he's always complimenting me or my smile or my laugh. He's always been doing it, even when we were first talking, but after that conversation those many nights ago, and after he and Felix met Kevin, it's like Chan's flirting has been dialled to eleven and his confidence is suddenly off the charts.

And what's worse is that it's so attractive.

So, so attractive.

I don't know what to think anymore. Chan's always running in my mind, 24/7, and it's harder to concentrate on anything else when he's flirting with me all the goddamn time. Don't get me wrong, it's not unwelcomed, it's just something I have to get used to. And Chan, annoyingly, knows the effect of what his flirting is doing to me. He's amused. He's having fun. He chuckles whenever he sees my face flush a deep apple red, or smirks whenever I sputter in surprise. He's finding my reactions to his shameless flirting amusing, and honestly, it doesn't bother me as it probably should.