Solo (Eddie x Juicy)

Los Angeles

- Gaege's POV –

I grab my guitar and head on stage. People cheer and clap. I bow and take a seat on a highchair that's in front of the mic. I start strumming the intro to "The A Team" from Ed Sheeran and start singing. This was the first song I ever sang in front of anyone. I remember it like it was yesterday. It was in 6th grade. My legs we're trembling as I started singing in front of my whole class. I closed my eyes as I stopped. People clap. I open my eyes to everyone cheering for me. If that didn't happen I would never be here.

Once I finish the song people clap and cheer. I hear the crowd screaming they wanted more. So I started strumming again. The intro to a song I wrote about my breakup. (It's "Hate You" from Seann Bowe if you wanna check it out, it's a t the top!). I'm fresh out of a toxic relation with my ex-boyfriend. But feelings couldn't be changed.

"This will be the last song, I ever write about you."

"Cause it's the only way, left to communicate."

"You never listen to my music anyway."

I've written a few songs about him to escape my feelings.

"Look at me now, such a pitiful place."

"You found someone, I thought that help erase."

"These crazy thoughts that we never were broken."

I always tried to deny that our relationship was on the point of breaking. Trying to deny that he treated me badly.

"You can't see red flags trough rose colored glasses"

I denied all the red flags, blinded by love. The coming home late and drunk. The no replies, everything.

"I hate that I miss you, I hate that I'm lost."

"I hate those dead flowers you taped to your wall."

He has been the only love I've known in my life. My parents died when I was really young. Our bedroom wall was taped with flowers he liked, but they of course withered away. They smelled and we're so ugly. Once he left I tore them right off.

"I hate that you're okay and I can't move on."

"I hate that somehow this is all my fault."

Since he knows how to live on his own the breakup was naturally much easier for him. But I relied on him for my mental support and everything. I don't know how to deal with mental health issues on my own.

I was always blamed for not being "lovable" enough, skinny enough or pretty enough. I was always the one to blame for the fights that happened. Even though I didn't know what I was doing wrong. I always tried to be a loving boyfriend. I was always nice to him even though he abused me physically when he was drunk.

"I hate that I'm wide awake, watching the door."

"I hate these long showers sitting on the floor."

Even though these lyric sound like I miss him, I don't. I'm always scared he'll come back and beat me again. I sit for hours in the shower trying to wash off the feelings of his filthy hands all over me. He raped me multiple times and I felt disgusting about it.

"I hate in the end it was me who was wrong."

"I hate that I don't really hate you at all."

I thought that we would be happy together but I couldn't be more wrong. I don't hate him though. Maybe I am not good enough. I don' blame him for not wanting someone like me. I hate myself too.

"I just have to ghost you, pretend that you're dead now."

"And if I see you out with friends."

"I'll just tell myself that it's a phantom or illusion, guess I haven't chosen which."

I try as much as I can to avoid him, even though this is hard. Living in the same town and all. I'm currently preforming in Los Angeles. I'm actually thinking about moving here eventually. It's a nice place and there are plenty of nice people around. Most people here are also supporting of the LGBTQ+ community. I've had a lot on hate on that where I live now.

"Look at me now such a pitiful place."

"You found someone I thought that help erase, these crazy thoughts that we never we're broken."

"You can't see red flags to rose colored glasses."

I finish up my song with the chorus once again. I feel a small tear roll down my cheek as I strum the outro. The room is quiet for a minute but then deafening applause and screaming fills it again. I thank the crowd and walk of stage.

- Eddie's POV –

That song. I felt all of his emotions running trough me. You could really tell this guy had been hurt badly. It made me very interested in him. So I followed him from that day on.

T.B.C~