❝I don't do regrets. Regrets are pointless. It's too late for regrets. You've already done it, haven't you? No point wishing you could change it.❞
Elissa Bardot-Gray was never the one to be classified as a "rule breaker". She had a high-rankin...
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THE PAINFUL SINGE of tears had long faded to a dull and tired ache. Elissa felt unable to produce any more tears even as she watched Wells slowly disappear beneath each shovelful of earth.
He was dead, and he wasn't coming back.
So many thoughts turned over and over in her head. How had it only been the night before that she'd seen him alive and well? Didn't they smile and tease one another, thinking that things were only going to get better from now on?
Elissa's heart clenched in her chest and it momentarily shattered the hollowness that had taken over when she first laid eyes on him hours beforehand.
If only she'd stayed with him. She should have been there when he needed her the most. But no, she was tired. Elissa left him at the edge of camp when she knew that the area around them was dangerous.
Now he's dead.
Gritting her teeth, her fists clenched tightly at her sides as a wave of self-loathing washed through her.
Elissa didn't know how long she stood in front of his grave—now the fourth in the row of their dead. She felt disconnected. Numb to the crisp gust of wind that swirled around her. Those that had shown up to pay their respects blurred around her, their words sounded far off, like they were standing on the other end of a long corridor. She could hear them but couldn't make out their words. She was sure someone recited the Traveler's Blessing, and then those who'd shown up, slowly began drifting away until only a few remained.
Movement on the other side of the clearing caught her attention, and she forced her tired eyes up, only to land on Clarke. The blonde girl clutched Finn's arm s if her life depended on it, her eyes red and puffy, face wet with tears. Elissa could only watch how Finn held Clarke tightly, whispering words of comfort into her hair.
Elissa was unprepared for the annoyance that welled up inside her. Clarke was acting as if Wells meant the world to her, gaining sympathy she didn't deserve. She treated him poorly, ignoring him, told him she hated him and that he meant nothing to her. She treated him like garbage from the moment they landed. And here she was, crying as if they'd been best friends again.
No, she snapped at herself. They were sorting things out. They were talking again; things were getting better. She has just as much a right to cry over him as you do...maybe more.
For a moment, Elissa allowed her eyes to slide closed, taking a deep breath before opening them again. Besides herself and Clarke, there were others who lingered. Monty stood awkwardly behind Clarke and Finn, wringing his hands, eyes darting back to the Dropship where Jasper still laid. To his left, Harper stood silently, face puffy as she stared down at the grave.
