acceptable | larry stylinson

two

Today i woke up with a loud ringing from my alarm clock. i sighed and slowly began to get ready. today was a big day for me due to the fact that it's my first ever therapy session. i make it sound like it's almost a good thing but it's not. i'm so messed up i have to go to therapy. what a looser.

I went to see if my parents were awake but i just found them asleep on the couch like always. my mum on one couch, and my dad on the other. they were most likely drunk and argued for a bit while i was asleep last night. i ended up sleeping early due to me wanting to have plenty of sleep for today. i'm so nervous if i'm being honest.

my appointment was in one hour, so i decided to go ahead and leave since the place was a bit far away from my home. i got into my black range rover and turned on the heat due to it being such a cold winter morning.

and there i was. i'm here. what am i doing here? i couldn't tell you. do i think this will help any? no not really, but it's worth a shot i guess.

i walk in and there is a office with the name "Louis Tomlinson" on it. i slowly walk in and nock on the door. he looked busy so i felt bad but then he looked up at me.

woah. he has ocean blue eyes, a bit of paler skin, soft looking hair, and just wow. everything about him took my breath away. he was wearing a black suit which made me a bit uncomfortable due to me only wearing a pair of black skinnies and a band t-shirt with a thick warm jacket.

"ah you must be harry! i'm Louis!" he said with a bright smile putting out his hand for me to shake. "erm hi yea i'm harry, harry styles." i said nervously taking his hand. "great great just have a seat there and we'll get started!" he said with a smile. he's so kind which i didn't really expect, but to be honest, i'm not exactly sure what i expected.

"so harry, tell me a bit about yourself. you don't have to tell me anything too deep or personal but i just want to get to know you before we start eh" he said.

"erm..i'm not sure what to say." i said shyly a bit embarrassed. "oh it's okay harry! just tell me like, erm, your favorite color or your favorite singer. things like that!" he said smiling.

"oh uhm well i really like the color blue, i really like Stevie Nicks, erm and i like the Beatles i guess." i said nervously. "oh yea yea i like them! now what are some things you enjoy to do in your free time?" he asked me. "um, i have quite an interest in writing and poetry. i love reading. i occasionally sing too..." i said with no confidence because i knew i sucked at singing. just like i sucked at everything else. "ohh i will definitely have to hear you sing one day!! i'm sure you're great!" he said with a smile.

"alright so harry, this is going to be the first question that is a bit deeper but trust me whatever you tell me stays between me and you only and i need you to know i will never tell anyone what you tell me." he said to me and i nodded as an answer.

"harry, when did this all start?" he asked me slowly. "erm, i- i'm not sure. maybe in grade 8 or 9. i'm a senior now so it's erm..it's been a bit." i said ashamed. "and harry, have you ever self-harmed?" he asked. i was taken back by the question because nobody knew i did that except for me. "erm..yea i have actually. i do it quite often um-" i said and coughed trying to get him not to catch on at the often part.

to my surprise though, he looked like what i said didn't phase him. how? "well harry. that's what i'm here for. each day you come here, we are going to be discussing different topics every day. some are more harsh then others, and some are easier then others. i'm going to help you harry. no matter how much it takes." he said looked at me in the eyes. wow. his eyes. shut up harry. i told myself.

"uh yea okay." i said awkwardly. why do i always have to be so awkward ugh. "well then harry, our session is done for today. i'll see you monday though!" he said with a smile. i began to get up until he stopped me and said, "oh harry i almost forgot! here, just in case you ever need something or someone." i looked down and it was a piece of paper with a number on it. his number. "oh erm yea i'll give you a text if i need anything." i said walking out.

what a day. just what i day.

two weeks later:

i went home and began writing in my poetry book.

Hiding the hurt, hiding the pain,
Hiding the tears that fall like rain.
Saying i'm fine when i'm anything but.
This ache in my soul rips at my gut.

i sighed and closed my book. i began to walk to my room when i began to hear yelling and screaming from downstairs. it was my parents. then all the sudden, i heard glass shatter. i immediately ran down there scared of what had just happened.

my mum was lying on the floor still yelling, but when i went to go help her up, i felt a strong sting against my head. my dad punched me in the face. i held my face with my hand, not exactly sure what to do and just stood there. then, as i tried to move, my dad took me by the arm and said, "DONT YOU DARE TRY TO STAY ON HER SIDE. SHES JUST A LITTLE WHORE!! SHES A NASTY SLUT!" he yelled in my face. tears began to form on my face. when my father saw, he slapped me on the face. "YOU DONT CRY IN THIS HOUSE YOU FAG!!" he said yelling at me. it took all of me to just move. i ran to my room not knowing what to do or say.

that's when i remembered. Louis.

to louis: hey it's harry. i'm sorry if i'm bothering you..i know it's kinda late but i really need someone right now."

i sighed and got into my bed waiting for a response. that was until i heard a small sound from my phone.

from louis: hey harry. do you want me to come pick you up and we can talk or something? i'm always here x

what do i do in this situation?! yes, i need someone right now and he's all i have, but i don't know what if he tries to kill me or something. harry he's your freaking therapist go talk to him!! my mind told me. so i did as it told.

to louis: um yea okay i'll send you my location and you can just pick me up if that's okay...or i can drive to wherever ig it's up to you."

from louis: i'll pick you up. be there in 10 x

before i knew it, i was going outside to louis' car.

what am i doing.