Careless whisper

The begining of the end, Charls Hope 1982

Somehow I survived another day, the thought of you in my mind pushes me to carry on. I remember the time you took me down to the beach, on our way to see my mom, we stopped in the beautiful little town of Charls Hope, to admire the breathtaking scenery of the beach. Where the shimmering, tears of the water washes away the sorrows of the dry sand. I remember that fresh smell of the sea, the gust of wind creeping upon me, soothing to the mind, relaxing to the soul. My love, I remember the smell of the hotdogs, that I long to taste again.

I remember the feeling of the warm sand under my feet. The sound of children playing, the volley ball bouncing off the surfaces of hands ,like trash being thrown around, unwanted, unloved. I feel your presence, I feel your heart, beating in the palm of my hand, I feel your love around me like you are actually with me, or are you actually here? I see you now clear as day, standing in front of me, you are just as I remembered. Your long blond hair dancing in the wind.

But does my mind deceive me? Are you just a figment of my imagination? Just like all the other wretched being that claim these lands. Why does my mind play me like a fool? Why can't anything be true. I am hanging on a thread at this point. My next move is yet to be planned, but as usual their will be consequences, challenges, games that my mind tries to play, to trick me into believing. My mind is set, and my heart still beats for you, I shall now go with the wind as there is nothing els to do. No going back, atleast not as yet. But soon my love, soon enough I shall be in your arms again.

The memories that I have of you are slowly fading, so i repeat them to myself every day, like a mantra, like my prayers, hoping that they dont slip away and leave me an empty shell. That's what scares me, not the fact that I remember what happened, what I did, but the realization that at some point all that I once knew will we wiped away.

Do you remember our first valentine's day together, I woke up to the smell of a delicious breakfast, awaiting me, baked potatoes, ravioli, caramel glazed buns and the most delicious creme brulee. Although the food was delicious, I longed the taste of your lips, it was my first time, and something about it was magical. Well who can I fool, what am I even saying, we were young, young in soul and young at heart. The way you treat me, the way you talk to me, unforgettable. Your touch of love leaves me with love bruises as a reminder that I was once touch by a god, and your wand leaves me breath less, panting for air, gasping like a dog after a long run. It was like a spell being casted over me, Your hands on my throat and your eyes on me I could feel your love. The atmosphere, filled with compassion as I took all of you and gave all of me. I spewed my heart to you. And you took that from me, something secret, ment to be kept in a safe place behind locks and, thrown in the deepest parts of the ocean locked in a safe that only you that the combination to.

But oh what a fool I was to believe that you were thrust worthy, of such a precious thing, something so pure. You took me for granted and went to her, that three headed tyrant of a woman, who shall burn in the pits of hell in the din of the hottest flame, being held down by her deed and left to burn. But I mean I can't blame her, maybe she was just like me, maybe she was just a fool as i was, tricked and deceived by your cunning look and enticing words. Oh well it's too late for her anyways, I wish I had considered that fact that she was blinded as I was, before i did what i had to do.