忘れる forget. || tsukihina band au (on hold)

two

TSUKISHIMA'S POV

That Saturday came around quicker than I thought it would, and I woke up later than usual. The whole thing with Yamaguchi was really messing me up, but honestly it made me realize that I was never actually in love with him. I might have loved him because he was my best friend of course, but that's not the same as being in love. I guess what really made it worse was just how shitty he actually was the whole time. He could've said he didn't love me the way he thought he did. I might've been hurt in the moment, but maybe I'd have realized what I did sooner. Not only that, Hinata didn't deserve this. No one did.

Honestly, I did like Hinata back then. He definitely was annoying, but I was attracted to him. Yamaguchi seemed convenient though, I suppose. Maybe I would've been better off taking my chances with Hinata, but he always seemed head over heels in love with Kageyama. The day they got together felt like the worst day of my life at the time, and I think that's what made me get with Yamaguchi in the first place. He was my shoulder to cry on that night, though I never told him why I was so upset at the time. I talked to Hinata less and less after that. I basically avoided him, and we only ever spoke at games and practice. He tried to talk to me after our graduation, and I just brushed him off like an asshole. Up until the other day when I called him, I hadn't spoke to him since high school. I'm sure it hurt him, and even after all that time he was still so nice to me. Still.

Sometimes I wonder if I had just let go of all my anger and hatred, would I have gotten what I wanted? Would I have ended up with Hinata? It didn't really matter anymore. All of those feelings faded over the years. I got over the fact that he didn't want me and started to deal with all my other issues. I was still very guarded, but I wish I had been that way to Yamaguchi because I began to feel like I was spiraling all over again.

I picked up my phone and checked my instagram feed. A post from Tendou came up. It was a video of their band captioned 'Sneak peak of the new song. see ya at 8.' It wasn't long, but I found myself excited to hear it tonight.

I scrolled through my phone some more before I FaceTimed Hinata. I didn't even really notice I was calling until he actually picked up.

"Tsuki! You miss me or somethin?!" He laughed and then winced suddenly.

"What? No," I scoffed. "What are you doing, and what's that sound?" I asked.

He lifted up his phone to show his back. He was getting tattooed, but his back looked almost fully covered.

"Last session. Touch ups and detailing. Might not be done until like right before the show. Speaking of, are you coming?" His eyes glowed with that question.

"I'm not sure yet," I said, even though I knew I was. I might not have liked him anymore, but I did still want to be a decent friend and support him. It was the least I could do.

"Oh.. Okay. Well I have to go. I'll see you later if you make it. Bye!" He smiled, but I could see the hurt behind it.

"Bye," I replied.

After the phone call ended, I finally got out of bed. It was around two, and my stomach was growling since I missed breakfast, but I decided to get something while I was out. I had a bit of a drive to make to the venue. I put on a nice outfit, but made sure not to over dress since it was a concert, then I grabbed my things and made my way out of my apartment. I had to make about a three hour drive, but the venue was in a really nice area.

The drive didn't feel nearly as long as it actually was, but I made it to town around 6:30. I went into a little flower shop I saw online and went to pick up a bouquet for Hinata. I planned on leaving it somewhat anonymously though. As I was walking around, I spotted Yamaguchi and Kageyama together, and my blood started to boil.