Faith [Eren x Reader]

Stargazer

(re uploaded bc i edited)

ANAL! DUBCON! ALSO!!!! whippets (inhaling nitrous oxide) is involved in this chapter! (reader and eren). if u don't like that, this chapter isn't for you. can yall tell how much i luv body worship xd

i made a playlist for this fic! they're songs based/inspired/i listen to while writing this. link will be on AO3

You almost cried when saying goodbye to Eren. Keyword: almost. As soon as you turned your back to him and walked towards the airport doors, unstoppable tears welled in your eyes. But you refused to look back. It would have crushed your pride had he seen you cry just because you were going home. It was hard enough to pinpoint the exact reason why subtle tears ran down your face, but that was a problem that would go unsolved.

He didn't even kiss you goodbye. Was he supposed to? Are my expectations too high of him? Am I expecting too much from a man? Maybe it was time for you to decide that you would no longer expect anything from Eren. Although, it would probably take some time. As you look down on Seattle from the clouds, you wonder if Eren is thinking about you.

He doesn't call or text for a few days, his excuse being: 'figured you'd need a break from me,' which was laughable because you could never get enough of him. He would send status updates of his day, complaining or bursting with excitement about a new deal. You caught yourself smiling at your phone every time he replied. You began to plan when you'd ask him when you would see him again. Ask too soon, and you're afraid of coming off as desperate and lonely. A few weeks, maybe? Pretend to be busy?

You're sitting in front of your computer one evening, blasting music in your headphones and typing away on your laptop when the blare of a FaceTime call interrupts your train of thought. Eren, of course. Biting your lower lip, you hover your mouse over accept, hesitating to answer. Don't I want to play hard to get? Not seem like I'm ready to use at his disposal? Isn't it time to set some boundaries? You look away from your screen, impatiently waiting for the FaceTime call to finish dialing.

Silence feels like heaven for a moment before your music continues playing. Your phone pings immediately. Dreadfully, you look to your phone.

Wyd?

With a groan, you flip your phone's screen to face your desk. It was hard to focus on what you had been doing now that the thought of Eren being upset when you didn't pick up plagued your mind, but onwards you pushed until midnight approached. Finally in bed, ready to sleep, are you prepared to look at Eren's texts. He only texted once more after his failed FaceTime attempt.

Too busy for me?

In your mind, you accuse him of being a narcissistic prick but applaud him for having the courage to say such a thing. As an apology, you press FaceTime, awkwardly blinking at your phone as the immediate 'Call Failed' message puts you to a stop.

Call failed?

Rapidly, you go to text him back but are unsure of what to say. Should I be this frustrated? Should I be embarrassed? Frowning, you decide to leave him on read and go to sleep, turning your ringer off and 'do not disturb' on.

As predicted, Eren texted you back by the time you woke up, asking, 'Are you mad at me??'.

Grinning, you reply.

No lol why would I be mad?

There is an obvious moment where Eren pauses to choose his words very carefully before texting back.

Nevermind. Call me when you get the chance. It's hard to tell if he's stern or just straightforward. It's not exactly the satisfying answer you were looking for, but good enough for now. He'll learn that you aren't disposable. But, the message was making you slightly anxious. Did he want to talk about something serious?