Unexpected Family

What If They Say No?

Billie's POV

I didn't cry in the meeting.

I sat straight. I answered every question. I told them I'd give up whatever they needed me to. I said all the right things or I think I did.

But the second I got home, I fell apart.

The front door closed behind me, and it hit me all at once. The cold. The fear. The ache behind my eyes I'd been holding off for hours.

What if I'm not enough?

What if they don't care how much I love them?

I walked straight past the living room, past the toys on the floor and the drawings taped to the wall, and into the kitchen.

I leaned against the counter, hands gripping the edge like it was the only thing keeping me upright.

I didn't mean to cry.

But I did.

Quiet, shaky sobs that I didn't want anyone to hear.

And of course, that's when I heard the tiniest voice behind me.

"Bee?"

I turned. Skylar was standing there, barefoot in her unicorn pajamas, holding her dinosaur by the tail. Her hair was messy, her eyes still puffy from napping.

I wiped my face quickly, but she saw.

She always sees.

"Did someone hurt you?" she asked.

"No, baby," I said, kneeling down. "No one hurt me."

"Then why are you crying?"

I didn't know how to answer. Not in a way that made sense to a three-year-old. Not without saying too much.

"I'm just... a little scared," I said finally. "But I'm okay."

She came over and wrapped her arms around my neck without a word.

And then, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, she whispered, "It's okay. I get scared too. But you always hold me."

God.

This kid.

I held her tight, sinking into the hug like I needed it more than air.

Mackenzie wandered in a few minutes later, dragging a blanket and announcing she had to poop, which broke the moment but also reminded me:

This is real.

This is messy and imperfect and loud and emotional and exhausting.

But it's real.

And I want it.

I want them.

Even if I have to fight harder than I ever have before.