bad boys do it better. (pico x keith)

guns, greetings, and a whole lot of gay.

Keith's POV

"HOLY FUCK! THATS YOUR DAD!?"

I exclaimed, almost shaking the whole building with how loudly I'd exclaimed it. Pico jumped a little as I stared in awe at his father.

His dad was the Tankman CAPTAIN. Like, John Captain! The guy I'd been wanting to rap battle for years, and now he was standing right here. It was amazing, oh! This is my chance to ask him!

Captain laughed, walking forwards and ruffling my hair.

"This is your boyfriend, huh?"

He asked. Pico visibly paled, nodding. He was clawing at his arms nervously, as if he was expecting some kind of hateful response. Instead, John just burst into giggles.

"Wow, you managed to get a relationship? I'm floored, really. With a dick that tiny and a nicotine addiction that big I didn't think you'd be able to do it, but look at you. He's cute too!"

He remarked with a smile. Pico just rolled his eyes, but I giggled.

"Y'see, Pico's my ADOPTED son. I'm a single father. You can really tell since if he was my biological child he'd look a lot better round here."

He joked, gesturing to his face and then his crotch. Pico buried his face in his hands, leaning on the kitchen table. He looked glad his dad wasn't mad, but this seemed so much worse to him.

I glanced back up at Captain, a wide smile on my face.

"I was wondering if you'd like to rap battle me sometime! I'm really good! I used to do it with my... ex.. girlfriend... but now I guess it's just me. Heh."

I mumbled, trailing off a little as I continued. Pico's dad put a hand on my shoulder, laughing.

"Beating the shit out of a little kid via rap battle sounds wicked, im in. Only if Pico gets to watch me kick your ass."
Was his response, as he held out his hand for me to shake. I grinned at a very exasperated Pico as I shook Captain's hand almost a little too excitedly. This was it! I was gonna get to rap battle one of the coolest soldiers in history!

Pico's POV

I can't believe my dad wasn't more sarcastic with this. I guess I freaked out over nothing. Keith looked absolutely ecstatic at the idea of having a rap battle with him, and his cute little smile made me sort of excited too. It would be fun to watch, but Im really hoping it's Keith who wins, because you wouldn't believe how much I know my dad is going to rub it in my face if he wins instead.

"So, you're not mad?" I asked. My dad cooked an eyebrow, chuckling a little. It was relieving, but surprising. Normally he judged every little thing i did. Sure, it was his sense of humor, but it still felt embarrassing.

"No, no I'm not mad." John replied. "You two look happy. I'm just used to you going out with whores, so this is a rather pleasant surprise." He smirked, and I just rolled my eyes.

I turned to look at Keith, who was still staring up at my dad like he was the best person in the world. I couldn't help but smile seeing just how excited he was.

Perhaps this wouldn't be so bad.

(Sorry for the short chapter! I have an important announcement coming up really soon that I hope you guys will like!)