The Game (Benny watts TQG) [Thomas Brodie Sangster]

Part 36 I Want A Baby

I laid in the dark hotel room, Laid on the bed listening to the car's drive past the hotel, and people sometimes go down the corridor outside the door. I Watched the little Dice-shaped clock on the bedside table tick away.

"Are you okay?" Benny asks as he laid his head on my shoulder, his chin on my shoulder his head nuzzled into my neck, his arm around my waist tracing little squares on my stomach His other arm under my neck so I was laying my head on it rather than the pillow 

"Thinking"

"I can tell. You're deathly quiet and look like your gonna kill me" He smirked giving my bare skin a kiss "What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter I'm just thinking"
"Yes but your thinking.... about stuff. You always make that face when you're tied up in your head"

"What face?"

"That face." He laughs "The you might murder me, you might burst into tears, or you might drink a whole bottle of rose in one shot. So can you please just tell me, what's the matter?" 

"I've been thinking about stuff... that's all benny"

"About what stuff?" He asked sounding more worried as time went on "You're- you're not.... Breaking up with me are you?"

"No, No. No." I smiled turning to lay on my back he moved away sitting up a little on his knees, I smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck giving him a little kiss "Of course not"

"You worried me for a minute" He laughed "Then please... what is it?" He asks taking my hands 

"Benny.... I've been thinking, There is something I want"

"What is it? Whatever it is, we can figure it out, If it would make you happy" He cooed kissing my hands

"I want a baby" 

"You- You what?" He asked his face reading of utter shock and a little panicked

"I Want a Baby" I repeated 

"Yeah..... that's what I thought you said" He answers looking now very panicked, I giggled a little to myself noticing his face it was that look benny does sometimes, His brain is so logical and methodical when presented with something he doesn't know, understand or anything like that he makes this face, It's like his brain is rebooting, actually, he's been having that face a good while now 

"Benny? Hello? Ohh noo did I break your brain?" 

"Hu, sorry.... You're uhh you're serious?"

"Yeah"

"Y/n.... we've been over this"

"I know, but... I don't want to wait all that time, for us to get a house, and get married, and all these other things, I... I wanna have a baby now." 

"Now!"

"Not like right this very second benny" I laughed "But soon, Like the next couple of months we... start really trying"

"Trying, for a baby?"

"That's what I want"

"I don't know y/n"

"You literally said earlier you were gonna take me upstairs and get me pregnant"
"In all fairness.... I was in a weird horny mood. We know not to take anything I say that close to an orgasm seriously," 

"Well, I want a Baby. Discuss" I said laying down getting cosy in the bed so he laid down beside me the two of us getting comfy 

"We cannot afford a Baby"

"Babies are free."

"I mean the stuff a baby needs, clothes, tiny shoes, a crib, a.... what's the pushy thing?"

"Pram?"

"Yeah. they are expensive" 

"Okay, I'm sure we could go around the second-hand stores and things and get stuff that isn't too bad, and I'm sure my parents have got some of my baby stuff up in the attic, Hell they'd probably buy us a crib if we announced to them I was pregnant"
"True. Where are we going to put a Baby and its stuff? we have a one-bed apartment.... that doesn't have heating ninety per cent of the time" 

"well initially it will have to sleep in our room"
"why?"

"You have to when there firstborn, check they're breathing and such"
"Oh. Okay, then where?"

"Outside the window till we get settled with a house?"

"You want us to try and move, with either you being pregnant or a newborn?"

"Okay, fair point. But it would make us get our butts in gear about finding a house. and we'd look so cute house hunting if I had a baby bump"
"Yeah, but if you have a bump then your not gonna wanna walk around a whole lot, or climb stairs?"

"True."

"and.... what will people say, we're still young, unmarried, living together, neither of us have a 'real job' and then we have a Baby."

"You really don't want a baby do you?"

"Y/n no. It's not that I don't want a baby. Of course, I want a baby, a little baby with, My hair, your eyes, and a mix of the two of us, train them up in chess and make them a grandmaster by the time they're sixteen. and Of course, I wanna watch your stomach grow and give it kisses every day but... I don't know how it would work or how we would do I mean, we could be terrible parents. Believe me y/n there's nothing I want more than a little house, a baby and you as my wife but I don't know if Now is the time"

"Benny if we sit around wondering if now is the time it never will be, we'll still be in our apartment unmarried, without kids in another five, ten years from now. I know you're scared, I am too but if we don't do it now we might never do it" I explained "Let's just fuck it and do it, see what happens we might fuck it all up but at least we gave it a shot, we have to jump... we might fly or we might fall flat on our faces but Unless we jump we'll never know and we'll just be stood here forever" 

"Okay"

"Okay?"

"Okay..." He smiled holding my hands "You're right. You're always right." He smiled giving my lips a little kiss "But. I'm not changing my mind, we're not having a baby until after we get married" 

I nodded a little upset but I accepted that, honestly that was better then I thought I was going to get.

"Y/n?"

"Yes benny?"

"will you marry me?"