U̶N̶C̶O̶N̶D̶I̶T̶I̶O̶N̶A̶̶L

_GUILT & REMORSE_

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As soon as Veeranshu stepped into his realm, he summoned his cheel form to unleash his inner beast by letting his animal instincts kick in, which makes him a lot more ruthless...a lot more brutal and a lot more destructive. Being the head of the eagle clan, the 𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚 amongst all, he wouldn't spare a chance to assert his dominance. All his decisions driven by the force of impulse irrespective of the consequences.'Power without abuse loses its charm' a notion he would always stick to. As eerie as his ideologies may seem, his idea of solace was no different~a feeling when his nails (talons to be precise) dig deep into the skin, piercing everything that gets in the way till they make it to the bones, and blood oozing out, till his claws get fully drenched in it. A scene that would be dreadful and petrifying for others but a delight to him.

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As sun rays peeped into Bani's room only to wake up her from her sleep slumber, that's something she would always do, try to catch up her lost night sleep in the morning, then she grabbed her phone from the bedside table and left Meera a message, '𝘔𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴'?
Knowing that it's gonna be a long day for her as she had to wrap up all her projects and other pending work commitments to meet the deadline since she took a week off work for the wedding. Hurriedly, got into the bathroom to freshen up, had her breakfast and rushed back into her room. That's when her phone beeped, a text from Meera~'𝘐 𝘨𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘐 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘯 my 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘥𝘢𝘺', to which Bani replied..𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩!!𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘪𝘥; '𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘱𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘻𝘪𝘱,𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘢 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘻𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶'.
𝘐𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳,𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘔𝘦𝘦𝘳𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘵𝘩 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 a 𝘩𝘺𝘱𝘰𝘨𝘭𝘺𝘤𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘤.

•••

The 'work from home' alternative worked well for her since it being inclusive of flexible working hours, a better escape for her sleepless nights and a great time to manifest ideas that fail to pop in during the day, for her being a content writer in a media firm. As the nation had still to get over the aftermath of the pandemic, a great option indeed. She grabbed her laptop to check her mails and drafts, and in a split second her face dropped, her hands reaching out for her phone to call Mansi, an intern in their firm and voiced '𝘐 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮,𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘳𝘢𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘱...𝘉𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴*...𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮,𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩.𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘊𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘧, to which Mansi answered '𝘯𝘰 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 a few 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘮 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴,𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘬𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴. Bani hung up the phone saying '𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘪𝘵,𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘺𝘱𝘰𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨'.

Winding up all her work at midnight, she pulled out a novel from her bookshelf, well aware of the fact that she wouldn't doze off any sooner as when the sleep wave hit her at 11, she was busy compiling materials for Mansi's project as she needed help, and won't drift off for an hour or two at least.

~•~•~

Books and novels always have been her eternal love. Movies, music and memories her lullaby, but one of them always a bit sketchy.

Mr Sharma brought her home when she was 10 as her parents died in a car accident, that's what she knew, rather was told. The fact that she didn't have a single memory of the precious 9 years of her life weighed her soul.𝙼𝙴𝙼𝙾𝚁𝙸𝙴𝚂~The only thing she was left with, the only thing she had to hold onto was just~ lost and gone. The guilt was just unbearable.
Meera knew about this and reasoned that she was present in the same car as her parents but she being in the back seat survived with some injuries which include a head one too, which could have had led to the memory loss. But no amount of consolation could help her get over the fact that she didn't remember her parents.

Turning down the pages of the novel, she came across a photograph, a picture she found lately, the only tangible proof that she didn't come out of the blue. Looked like a school photograph, a group of children may be of 3rd or 4th grade, seated in front of the school building with name engraved, "MOUNT St. MARY'S SCHOOL" she could easily identify herself but none other, which added more to her eagerness.
Bani's parents were never a point of discussion in Sharma house, no matter how badly Bani wanted it to be. Any time she would express an urge to know about her past, it would trigger the protective mama bear instincts in Meera, thinking of it, the flashback of the conversation they recently had, played in her mind.
𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘵.. 𝘉𝘢𝘯𝘪, exclaimed Meera, trying every possible way to change her mind.'𝘔𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘐'𝘮 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳, 𝘔𝘦𝘦𝘳𝘢 𝘋𝘪, they 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘯, 𝘢𝘵𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥' Bani sighed.'𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸,𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶' yelled Meera.
'𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘢𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦..A 𝘊𝘌𝘈𝘚𝘌𝘓𝘌𝘚𝘚 𝘝𝘖𝘐𝘋 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘪𝘵𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧', Bani tried to explain.
Not knowing how to rationalise her thoughts, Meera stuttered '𝘋𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥.. 𝘉𝘢𝘯𝘪'. Bani on realising that Meera was on the verge of tearing up, just gave in '𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴' she teased engulfing her in a hug, ' 𝘴𝘰,𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 one' snapped Meera hugging her more tightly.

𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗼𝘀𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗸𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝘁 that's only the first half of the phrase, the second half 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝘀𝗳𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸, often overlooked. Knowing that Meera wouldn't budge anyhow, she decided to keep mum then, but now that she was not here Bani had made her mind, to talk to Mr and Mrs Sharma regarding this, just waiting for the right moment to strike.

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