Dean and Castiel Go on a Hunt

Chapter Twelve

Sam and Dean stood frozen until Sam finally managed to take a moment to glance at Dean. He was staring intensely at Cas, whom of which returned the look. He started to look back and forth between them as they continued to stare. He raised his eyebrow, confused, and finally cleared his throat loudly, breaking the lock they had on each other's eyes. He then nearly gagged, realizing what had just happened. The events of the month prior flashed before his still disbelieving eyes but he pushed the images down, refocusing on Cas. Dean blinked and swallowed hard before finally recollecting himself. "... Have you been here the entire time?" Dean tried to control his voice, which was now clearly shaking from anger and worry. "Yes," Cas said hesitantly. Dean took a deep breath and looked down. "Why... why didn't you stay in the hospital, Cas?" He said slowly, his hands clenching into fists. Sam stared at his brother, unable to recognize any of his body language, afraid of what he might do. "I was going to die either way, Dean. I know about the lead poisoning." Dean's head rose and his eyes softened toward Cas, yet his fists stayed clenched. "The nurse didn't tell me but... I could read it right off of her mind." Cas breathed deeply, the conversation had clearly winded him. Sam and Dean watched as Castiel took a few short, sputtering breathes. He pursed his lips together and closed his eyes as he attempted to take a straight breath, the wound clearly hurting him with every movement.

He opened his eyes and looked at Sam, then Dean before continuing. "I'm going to die either way, Dean," he repeated. "I just thought... that it would be better if I spent my last moments here... with you." Dean shifted on his feet, his eyes shimmering as they became wetter. "Don't talk like that Cas..." His voice shook, now completely with worry. His hands loosened and relaxed. "We'll find a way to help you, I mean... we always do." Sam's eyes started to water, he was unable to speak but he already felt as though he was not welcome in the conversation. "Can't you heal yourself?" Sam finally said, against his thoughts. Cas peeled his eyes off Dean to look at Sam. "I've tried, Sam. But my Grace... it's too depleted," he looked down at the table, his rich blue eyes now also started to glisten. "Can't we get some more? From another angel?" Dean's mouth lightly quivered. Cas quickly looked up, back at Dean. "No," he said gravely. He face hardened as he stared at Dean. Dean looked back at him, his soft watery gaze and upturned eyebrows wrinkled his forehead with distress and sadness. He then looked down, avoiding Cas' stare suddenly. Cas immediately relaxed his face and it returned to his mutual worry. "... I'm sorry, Cas," Dean whispered. "... Why?" Cas rasped, his breath was gradually becoming more labored. "It's all because I took you on this stupid hunt and -" Dean's voice weakened and cracked causing him to choke. "Dean," Cas started. "... Dean, look at me," he said sharply, wincing slightly. Dean slowly raised his head and looked into Cas' eyes as his filled with sorrow. "This... is not your fault. I asked... to go on that... hunt," he gasped. "I am not... a child... I was not your... responsibility." Dean looked at Cas and realized how pale he had become. He looked down at the floor around Castiel's feet and noticed the small pool of blood that was starting to collect. "Cas," Dean whispered. Cas followed Dean's gaze and looked at the floor. He then looked at the hand that still laid on his wound. He slowly lifted it to reveal that his palm and fingers were coated in fresh blood.

With his hand still lifted he slowly looked up at Dean, wide eyed with a look of pure terror on his face. He opened his mouth but all he was able to release was a whimper.

TO BE CONTINUED...