SECOND BOOK IN THE STARK'S SHADOW SERIES
With the discovery of her powers, Hydra was determined to take advantage of Y/N, Tony Stark's daughter. Realizing herself as a threat, she escapes utterly clueless for the dangers that lie ahead. Once her ene...
The sun peeping through the curtains covering the windows woke me up from my pleasant dream. Something was off though. I looked to the other side of the bed and it was left empty and was cold. Obviously Bucky had been gone for a while. He sometimes has really bad nightmares so he gets us to get some coffee, so I assumed he was in the kitchen or living room. Rubbing my eyes and throwing one of Bucky's t-shirts that was laid across the end of the bed, I sauntered into the kitchen. It was empty. I looked in the living room. It was empty as well. Where the hell could he be? I began frantically searching for any signs that he was here or was recently here. Nothing. The coffee maker had not been touched and the door was still locked. I rushed back into the room and ripped open the closet. Bucky's coat was gone. I ran to the door and his shoes were no where to be found. I quite literally ripped the apartment to shreds. No note, nothing, he was just gone.
Unable to hold back the tears any longer, I fell to the floor my back sliding down the door tears flooding my eyes.
Why? What had I done? Why did he leave me? He said he would always be there for me, but then again no one had ever kept their promise to me. He didn't even leave a note.
He was gone for months, and the longer he was gone the more I lost it. I guess I was in a deep state of depression and had lost all feeling to anything. I even began to question whether I truly loved Bucky or it was all even a fantasy. In my darkest moments, I even questioned if Bucky was even real or just a figment of my imagination to help cope with my trauma. I began to realize that as my mental conditioned worsened so did my memory. The brainwashing must have had an affect on memory retention as a side effect. It began with just small things but each time the thing I forgot got greater in importance. I even had to find a new apartment for a short time, because I forgot to turn the water off in kitchen while I was filling the sink to wash dishes and completely flooded the place.
Nightmares began to haunt my sleep waking me up sweating, crying, screaming, and panting. Flashbacks of who I once was, the torture I had endured from Hydra, and the visions of what I believed a non existent Bucky. Unable to bear the horror, I resorted to avoiding sleep at all cost, rendering me constantly exhausted.
I couldn't stand being in the apartment by myself any longer. I had to get a job or something. I needed a way to turn my internal feelings and anger into something positive. The only thing I knew that I knew how to do was kill. What better job than an assassin, a privately hired assassin to be exact. It pays well, you work on your time frame, and no commitments to anyone, and also no brainwashing which is a plus. I also had some special abilities, my powers, and the extensive Hydra training and experimentation, making me not a super soldier but enhanced I guess. Anyone who was worth anything in the world of assassins or needing assassins knows that people trained by Hydra are by far the most well equipped, making me valuable to persons of interest. All that to say, I was good and I know it so there won't be a problem finding a job.
I started with only a few nights a week working mostly as a bodyguard or undercover spy, but as time went on it became a nightly occurrence. The missions slowly became more and more extensive and dangerous, not for me but for my victims. I would leave at the crack of dawn for training or just to work out for 5 hours, come home shower, rest, and then around 3 I would head out for the night and usually didn't come back until the next day. It was a vicious routine but it worked. It kept my mind off other things though. Slowly though, I felt myself detaching from my humanness. I felt the need to kill, I craved it, the sight of blood, the screams of the injured, the thrill of the fight, the pleas of mercy that rang through my head.
I guess it was a way to escape. An escape from my reality. I projected on my victims what I indeed felt, I guess. I was not free from guilt. The times when I would sleep their screams and pleas of mercy would echo through my head, their spirits haunting my dreams. As much as I hated what I did, I felt like it was apart of me, it made me complete. Hydra had programmed me to kill and that's what I did, even when I had full control of my mind.
One morning as I was getting dressed to go train, I turned on the tv. (I get bored while I brush my teeth, ok)
"Breaking news. Yesterday the UN complex in Vienna was bombed in an attempt to assassinated all of the UN members. The UN had gathered to discuss the safety of those with enhanced physical abilities, powers, or access to weapons of mass destruction after the incident with a young enhanced girl named Wanda Maximoff resulting in many people's deaths. The leading suspect in this case is James Buchanan Barnes, also know as Bucky Barnes or the Winter Soldier, most commonly characterized by his metal arm. These photos were captured of him near the UN yesterday morning."
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At the mention do his name, I darted out of the bathroom gluing myself in front of the tv.
