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" You like Chaeyoung, don't you?"
Jaemin's breath hitched, a lump forming in his throat that he found himself trying to gulp down. The question he was trying to avoid being asked straightforwardly by the boy.
He felt his whole body go stiff, not knowing what to say while Jeno just looked at him with his signature eye smile, seemingly knowing something that the boy didn't.
Like how he liked the girl. Cough cough.
Somehow this elicited a memory in Jaemin, clenching his fist as he tried his best to push it down, back to the forgotten part of his mind.
♛
" Mommy! Daddy taught me how to punch today," the young and oblivious boy said, jumping in excitement as his eyes sparkled with happiness.
" Oh really?" the elder women asked, smiling at her son as he showed her what he had learned. " That's so cool, sweetheart," she exclaimed as she clapped while Jaemin ran towards her.
" Daddy said he would teach me how to use a gun soon," he happily stated, not knowing what kind of person his father was turning him into and the dangers it would bring him.
His mother's expression turned twisted, half smiling and half frowning with her eyebrows furrowed.
" Why would he teach you that?" " What's wrong mom? Its cool and fun to use!" the boy cheerfully responded, circling his small arms around her mother's waist.
She remained silent, not saying anything and instead continued to smile at the boy.
♛
" Don't think about anything else, son and just shoot ahead of you," his father urged, trying to get the boy to pull the trigger.
The blindfold blocked his vision as he stood stiff like a rock, his arms slightly shaky yet steady enough to remain on his target. The familiar screams that rang through his ears sounded like his own mother, yet his father continued to say otherwise.
" It's just a bad person who tried to kill your mother, you should get rid of her, right?" his father insisted while the boy nodded obediently. " Its just your mind that makes you think that its your mother, its all because of the blindfold."
At this point tears started streaming down Jaemin's eyes, too afraid to kill someone. It seemed so easy, pull the trigger and that's it, he could leave this behind him without anyone knowing the sin he made.
" Do it, pull the trigger," his father provoked.
And then, he did. He pulled it.
The loud bang echoed throughout the room as the sound of blood spluttering became louder than it was supposed to.
The boy immediately dropped the gun, taking off his blindfolds to see what damage he had caused.
Only to be met with the sight of his mother coughing out blood as she desperately tried to inhale oxygen.
" W-what," he stuttered out, his hands going numb by his sides.
" Oh did I mention the second part of our lesson is learning how not to care about who you kill?" His father said, a sly smirk on his face.
" You've done well," the cruel man praised before exiting the room, leaving the two inside.
The young boy immediately ram towards his mother, dropping to his knees as sobs escaped from his lips.
" N-no don't go, mommy you said you will stay with me forever," Jaemin choked out, not knowing what to do as he stared at his mother who struggled to turn towards him.
She barely managed to lift her hand, wiping the tears that trickled down his face.
" I love you, Jaemin, don't feel sorry about this, okay?" his mother gave him a weak smile before her hands fell down to her sides as her eyes gave in.
" The gun isn't fun," that was all he was able to say, the lies that his father had told him becoming more prominent.
The 12 year old boy sat there and cried, losing the only woman he had cared for. His mother that laid dead by his feet.
And it was all because of him.
♛
Jaemin harshly wiped the tears that had unconsciously fell, groaning as he contained his emotional self under his emotionless facade.
The sound of the gunshot still etched in his mind. Jeno was completely oblivious to his change of demeanour, still waiting for the boy's response.
" So...do you like her?" He teased.
" Get out," Jaemin coldly said, standing up and gesturing towards the door which left the latter confused by his sudden change in attitude.
Jeno only nodded and obediently obeyed his order, knowing well enough not to mess with him.
He slammed the door shut once his friend left, laying back down on his bed. Knowing well enough what the answer to his question was yet didn't want to say it.
" I can't like her," he sighed, rolling to his side as he stared blankly at the wall. " I can't care for her," he softly said to himself.
" Cause everyone I care for dies."
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this was a longer one HAHA i have motivation rn so time to go back to studying sigh
