Love me like for the first time

Red carpet

All ready you enter the limo that was called for you. There is a prepared champagne bottle in ice, you're not sure if you want more after drinking many glasses today already. But you're still very nervous so you surrender and open the bottle. You pass one glass to Sarah and you clink.

"You still haven't answered me, even though I think I know you enough to tell by myself" Sarah looks at you sipping her champagne.
"Answered what exactly?" you ask confused, but with a tinge of disrespect.
"If you're nervous about tonight" she tilts her head to have eye contact with you, but you look down trying to avoid it.
"I-, mmm" you play with your glass and ring, "of course I am nervous" you look into her eyes "It's a big night and we both worked so hard to succeed."
She smiles "I know, but I am sure there will be a lot of opportunities." She lifts your chin after you look down again.
"Yeah, there sure will" you quickly smile and turn to the window.

You worked so hard to get here, to be an actor. And it took so many years and pain to get at least nominated for an Emmy. You are scared that this was your last chance and if you will miss it, everything is going to be lost. But you know, Sarah is right, this is not the end of your career.

"No, I'm sorry, you're right, who cares if we win, we know how great we did, and being nominated is so far amazing. And, who cares about winning some stupid award when I've already won the best thing I could ever imagine, you? I love you so much and I'm so sorry, that I don't say it enough because you're the best thing that ever happened to me and I love you, truly, madly deeply, love you." tears fill your eyes. Sarah quickly grabs a tissue and soaks them up, from your eyes so you don't ruin your makeup.
You chuckle, and Sarah rests her forehead on yours. "I love you too" she whispers.
You try to kiss her, but she stops you, "We shouldn't, our lipsticks are going to get mixed and blurry." "you're right" you smile gently, pulling yourself back and watching running streets from the window.
Sarah sits closer to you and rests her head on your shoulder.
____________________________________

Sarah is squeezing your hand, and you close your eyes. "and the award goes to...", "y/n y/l/n".Oh god, you won, you can't believe it. You open your eyes turn yourself to Sarah and she kisses you. Everyone is clapping and Sarah is crying. Your dream came true. The whole audience is standing, clapping, and whistling. You are walking towards the stage, and on your way, people are shaking your hand. You're in such a shock, but so happy. He holds your hand and helps you up the stairs, shakes your hand very gently, gives you the award *it's pretty heavy* and leads you towards the microphone. You get there and the audience stays silent, you see the faces of your idols staring at you. Your throat gets dry and you have no idea what to say...

"holy sh*t, ouch" you wake up lying on the ground. You see Sarah sleeping in the car with her head falling out of the vehicle. "Oh god, I had no idea, I'm so sorry," someone says lifting you. You don't even turn around to see who was it, you are just squatting to have your face at the same height as Sarah's is. you have to hide your laughter, you're a bit drunk, and imagining that you just fell from the car right on the red carpet is so embarrassing, but at the moment it just seems so funny to you.

"Honey, wake up." you lift Sarah to a sitting position. "Sarah!" you take her face in your hands. "Cathrine!!"
She opens her eyes in shock. She looks around confused, and when she realizes she gasps "f*ck". You can't hide laughter anymore "I know right", "Come on, we have to go".

"That's so embarrassing," she says standing up. "Tell me about it, I fell on the f*cking ground," you say fixing your dress.
"Really? are you okay?" she looks at you.
"Yeah, I'm fine, well, as fine as I can be in this situation." you laugh.
You finally see the man that helped you stand up "I'm sorry." he says closing the door of the limo.
"It's totally fine, it wasn't your fault" you smile at him. You turn around and see how many people saw this. Everyone is taking your picture "amazing" you say smiling into the cameras.
You turn to Sarah and she looks at you too, you laugh at each other "I think I'm still dreaming" she chuckles. "But this is a f*cking nightmare, I can't believe it" you shake your head "How could we fall asleep? god".

You take gently Sarah's hand, but she squeezes it way harder and leads you toward the paparazzi. You turn around again to see the man *or boy* that operated the limo and you smile at him. He looks so devastated, but he doesn't respond.

Sarah leads you towards the photo wall with logos of Emmys on it. "Sarah, here!" "look at me" "to the right" "y/n" "at me" "here" "right"... you are just standing there smiling, you can't see anything, your eyes are still asleep and flashes from cameras aren't helping. After a few minutes, Sarah leads you away.

You are going away from the cameras to the rest of the actors, there are many groups of them. Sarah takes you to the one with her co-stars. She lets go of your hand and greets her friends. You're just standing there and smiling at them. When the guy from before walks past you with a saucer full of glasses of champagne.

Sarah just wanted to introduce you, but you turn to the guy and stop him. "May I?" you ask with a smile, he just nods avoiding eye contact with you. You don't want to torture him, so you just take two glasses, and check him with your eyes, but he is still looking away. You move from his way towards the group.

You pass Sarah one glass, figuring out that everyone is staring at you. You smile embarrassed and take a sip, expecting that someone is going to break the silence. "Thank you" Sarah smiles. "Folks this is...", "y/n" man next to you cuts Sarah off. "I'm David, it's a pleasure to finally meet you, after hearing so much about you," he says shaking your hand. "I hope that's just the bad things," you say turning back to Sarah. She laughs "there aren't any bad things about you, honey" and she squeezes your hand.

You are talking with them for a  few minutes, but you have to pretend that you're having fun. They are nice and funny, but you can't relax. You feel that you can't pretend interest anymore "Excuse me" you say putting the empty glass away and walking towards the bathroom. Sarah barely notices that you left, she's having generous fun, so you don't want to ruin it.

The bathroom is empty, you hold the corners of the sink and look at yourself in the mirror. "Put yourself together, you're gonna regret this afterward, you're supposed to have fun," you say to your reflection in the mirror. You take a few deep breaths trying to relax. *you will walk out of this room happy and friendly* *deep exhale*

You're walking towards Sarah's group when someone catches your forearm. You turn around.

"Hey"
"Oh, hi, I didn't see you" you greet Nicole Kidman, she did an amazing performance and was nominated in the same category as Sarah. "How are you enjoying the evening?" she asks still holding your arm, with a smile on her face. "It's going great, thank you for asking" you lie. You're not sure if she believed it or not, but she stops smiling and lets your hand go. "If you say so" she responds.

"And what about you?, How are you enjoying the evening so far?" you smile at her. "There's nothing, that few glasses of champagne wouldn't make great, am I right?" she laughs. "I can't disagree" you take two glasses and one pass to Nicole and you clink.

"I'll keep my fingers crossed for you" she whispers in your ear. "Thank you, I hope I'll see you later" you smile. "Indeed" she answers and turns back to her partner.

You turn back walking to Sarah, but the room fills with interviewers and photographers.