M4DN3SS R3DACT3D (a sh!t madness combat story)

[[SEVENT33N]]

"...It's SO cool, man. M'so happy! I look sick as fuck! Wait. How do you.. can I still kiss people? Or, um..."

Hank rolled his eyes. He was laying face-up on his bed, only half-dressed, hands resting lightly on his exposed stomach. The roughed-up mattress underneath him didn't help any of the constant aches and soreness in his body, but he liked the feeling of the sheets on his bare back instead of rocks or pooling blood.

Deimos had been going on and on about how much he was liking his new jaw. The mercenary wished they'd been as excited getting their own.

Deimos was still feeling around on it, completely amazed. "It's so cold! Is yours cold?"

"No, it- don't touch me." Hank mumbled, waving Deimos's hand away from their face. "Doc' shoulda' taken your voice box while he was at it."

Deimos let out a slight laugh and shrugged, "Sorry, it's just.. it's really cool, y'know?"

"Your mouth was ripped in two by a psychotic clown. You tellin' me that's cool?"

"A lil' bit. S'better than what I saw in purgatory."

Hank turned to look at him. "What'd you see?"

Deimos had to think.

Hank wasn't.. sympathetic.

Or empathetic.

He only cared because he knew he sort of had to.

So would Hank think he was dramatic?

Or weak?

Would Hank even believe him?

"Uh.." the younger man looked down at his fidgeting hands, "you're probably gonna think this stupid..."

"Never stopped you from talkin' before." Hank sat up, readjusted himself to face Deimos. "Tell me anyway."

Deimos stared at him, a little taken aback by the gesture, looking back down as soon as he met Hank's waiting stare.

He felt so small. He felt like this was wrong. He'd never been very open with Hank about anything. There was a lot the mercenary didn't know, and probably didn't care to know either. Deimos always assumed the older man wouldn't find the time or patience to listen to him any more than he was forced to. They were close enough, but Hank had still been so distant from the start.

Deimos began to think differently, though, hearing the slightest tone of sincerity in his voice. Maybe, for once, he really did care. Or was at least trying to.

Deimos took a deep breath, and looked back up at Hank. "Well. Um.. started off normal enough. Fuck ton of agents, nothin' I couldn't handle. Then I found Sanford."

Hank nodded, clearly now listening intently. Too late to go back now- Deimos forced himself to continue.

"And.. He got shot. N'killed, right in front of me. Then he came back somehow, n' I tried to talk to 'im, but.. y'know, darkness.. and he almost attacked me again, but I got away for a bit, then he found me and started makin' fun of me and... and he told me to shoot 'im, and... I didn't do it right away, so he was gettin' angry and called me a coward, and he said I was weak, and then..."

Deimos paused, covering his face with his hands.

"Sorry, I just- I can't-"

"Yeah you can," Hank said quietly, pulling his hands down. "You're fine. Go on. What'd you do?"

God. If Deimos didn't know he was at least trying to care, Deimos would've assumed he was doing this to humiliate him.

"I fuckin' shot him, Hank, that's what I did. I had to. I wouldn't have gotten out otherwise."

Hank stayed quiet. After a long pause, Deimos continued;

"And I know.. what you're thinkin'. It's stupid to feel bad about it because it wasn't even real-"

"No, s'okay."

Deimos froze, staring at Hank in disbelief.

"...It is?"

Hank nodded, "Mhm. Listen. I get it. Y'like the guy, a lot, you'd never hurt 'im for real. N'that seemed pretty real to you, didn't it?"

"I... guess so."

"Well, there ya go. Justified. An' look," Hank rested their elbows on their knees, now slightly closer to Deimos. "He's still 'ere, he's alright, you didn't hurt 'im at all. Y'did what ya had to do. That's it. Can't blame yourself too much when y'had no choice, right?"

Deimos nodded, not even able to find the words to describe how much he had to hear that.

"Alright." Hank sat back up and readjusted himself to lay back down. "Now stop gettin' all worked up about it before the man sees."

Deimos laughed, wiping his eyes to rid them of the tears he didn't even realize were there. "Okay, okay... I'll leave you be now. Sleep good, alright?"

"I'll try."

"Alright.. and- thanks. Y'know.. for lettin' me talk about that."

"Yeah. Uhh.. sure."

Deimos sat silent for a while, the only sound in the room over his own thoughts being Hank's slow, even breathing. It was comforting in a way, to hear them so calm for once.

-Because Deimos knew full well the man could never be that relaxed when he was conscious.

He carefully, as quietly as he could, stood up from his bed and left the room, giving Hank one last look before setting out to find 2BDamned and Sanford.