Vast Fields Of Light

Chapter 6

The golden disc of the sun rose slowly and sweetly in the blue sky as Dastan finished his story, describing their terrifying ordeal in the cavern beneath the Palace as they battled to stop Nizam carrying out his plan at the Sand-Glass. Tamina stood with her arms tensely held around herself, watching him pace up and down; her throat tightened in horror as she heard how he had had to choose between pulling her to safety and rushing to stop Nizam - and how she had let herself fall in order to make the decision for him.

"That is what I meant when I said that you are the heroic one, Princess," he told her quietly, coming to stand facing her and looking into her eyes with a soft intensity. "The sacrifice that you made-" his voice shook as Tamina's heart did the same, and she started to feel faint.

"Then what?" she asked with a dry throat.

Dastan exhaled. "By the time I - I caught up to Nizam, he was already plunging the dagger into the Sand-Glass." His eyes dropped from hers and his gaze darted unseeingly around the floor before him. "We fought - I tried to push him off - and then suddenly I realised that I had-" he hesitated, and his voice dropped to a whisper. "I pressed the jewel, and the sands flowed through the handle."

Tamina's breath froze. "You mean you pressed it by accident."

He hesitated again, his eyes dark, and there was silence.

"...No."

"But..." She inhaled, shuddering, and shook her head in a vain attempt to think clearly. "I don't understand... how could you - the exact thing we had been trying so hard to prevent - you - you knew that it was completely forbidden-"

"-By the gods, yes, I know," Dastan answered with rising frustration - "Look, I don't know how to explain it, Tamina. I - I - it was-" he stopped, took a shaky breath and ran a hand through his hair. "The whole thing took place in less than a second. Something just - clicked inside me, and it - it was as if I had to do it... it was like being in battle, and sensing your opponent behind you, and knowing the exact moment to turn and strike him-"

He hesitated and met her gaze again, with a shining expression in his eyes that she could not comprehend. "I pressed the jewel and I prayed harder than I have ever prayed in my life, to go back to the moment I first found that wretched dagger."

Overwhelming shock was causing her to struggle and trip over the import of his words. "You - you endangered everything. That should have destroyed the entire world-"

"But it didn't," he interrupted and stepped closer to her, taking her face in his hands with immediate tenderness. "I've thought about it, Tamina, you... your bravery, you gave your life without even hesitating - and the last thing you said to me - the last thing," he repeated, his voice dropping urgently low, "was that you wished we could be together. And - here we are."

He paused and she desperately searched his eyes without knowing what she was looking for. Dastan continued in the same urgent voice. "Your gods answered your prayers and mine, Tamina, and I am grateful to them every single day."

He stopped and they stared at each other. Tamina's heart pounded so hard it hurt, it felt difficult to inhale, prickles flashed over her skin. She stepped back from him just enough to make his hands fall from her face; a few tears fell from her eyes and she wiped them away quickly, seeing a deep sadness in his eyes as she did so.

"But you did not know they would answer those prayers," she finally insisted, then she swallowed as something dawned on her. "This is why you didn't tell me about that other time, isn't it?" she asked, her tone changing from pained to accusing. "You knew I wouldn't understand, you knew I'd be angry-"

His face clouded with exhausted annoyance. "Isn't it enough that I wanted to just - forget about the living hell we went through? Was I supposed to be keen to go through all those memories, to make you go through them-"

"I can handle some discomfort, Prince-" she snapped, searching for a solid foundation within herself - "I am the High Priestess of Alamut, the Guardian of the dagger, and you had no right-"

"I'm the Prince of Alamut now, Tamina," he interrupted, a defiant challenge in the clear blue sky of his eyes, "and I am not the only one who lies. You told me nothing about the dagger before you married me, even though it is a crucial part of ruling Alamut-"

"It is my responsibility!" she told him angrily. "Traditionally the husband of the High Priestess does not take part in that responsibility-"

Dastan smiled at her with the same smug smile that had infuriated her countless times already in their short marriage. "Well, good luck getting me to follow that tradition, Princess."

Just at that moment a quiet knock came at the bedchamber door and they both started in surprise. Then Dastan quickly turned away and went over to the bed to retrieve his tunic, as Tamina said, "Come in."

Her maidservant entered the chamber carrying a tray with a pot of sweet tea and two cups. Tamina suddenly became aware that the sun was fully up and blasting bright sunlight into the room.

"Good morning, your Highnesses," the young woman said quietly, glancing at the two of them in turn, and looking away from Dastan when she saw a sliver of his bare torso as his tunic came down over his head.

"Good morning, Laleh." Tamina sighed as the maid set the tray down on a side table, and the Princess put one hand on her hip and rubbed the other hand over her pale, drawn face. "See you soon," she said to the maid who nodded and quickly exited the room. Then Tamina looked over to Dastan, who was watching her quietly.

"Laleh will be back very soon to help me get ready for the ceremonies," she said tiredly.

He nodded. "I will leave you in peace," he said in an exhausted voice, making his way over to the door. He opened it, then Tamina said his name and he turned to look back at her with wary eyes.

"Do not come back here tonight," she told him quietly.

His tired face shadowed over, and he nodded silently and left the room.