A Life Worth Living

Epilogue

Epilogue

Sandro and I decided to stay in Florence, he has been busy painting the hanged men on the loggia. Lorenzo commissioned him for this intimidating piece. He truly has changed since our brother's murder. I remember a week after Giuliano, Lorenzo and I stayed up and just cried with each other. We sat at his tomb and just cried.

I write to Bianca always as we talk of the new things of our lives. I sit in Sandro and I's small villa that was gifted to us by Lorenzo after our wedding. Sandro and I married a year after the events. It was a gorgeous ceremony that brought much joy to our family.

Clarice and Lorenzo have had another boy in the time and now she is pregnant once more, our children have already grown so much. Tiny men. I laugh at that thought.

My hands carefully work with the thread as I rest my arms on my growing belly. This is Sandro's first child. It took a long while for me to be with child, I believe the stress really prevented me from being fertile. Eventually it happened and I've had the most active little baby. The child moves constantly putting pressure on my insides. Clarice and I seem to always be pregnant at the same time. I just skipped a child is seems. I giggle once again to myself.

Sandro walks into the room and shines a smile on me.

"How are you darling?" He asks leaving a kiss on my head

"I'm doing alright. Just thinking about everything. The war with the pope has me thinking of how we got here." I huff out

He pours himself a cup of wine and sits across from me.

"No need to worry. It's not good for you. Speaking of the war, Lorenzo approached me to ask if you wished to go with the rest of the family to the country in case of safety. You're pregnant so I thought it would be a good idea. I don't know what I would do if you were to get hurt." He explains

I shift in my sit a bit and stop with the thread.

"Is it our family country side villa?" I ask

He nods his head and continues. "Your nephews, Clarice, Carlo, Polizano. They will all be there."

"Carlo? I haven't seen him in so long. The child that recently arrived, Gulio, Giuliano's son, I have yet to see the boy." I spill

"Yes, I've met him. He really reminds me of Giuliano so much. So young and he already has the weight of the world on his shoulders. I relate to how he feels now from when I was a boy."

I sit and take a sip of wine.

"I'll go, if not to see family then to ease your mind. I won't be of much use in my condition." I laugh

"It's just not safe in the city. A change of scenery may also be a good thing." He says caressing my face and kissing me

He then rests his hand on my shoulder and kisses my cheeks and then my belly.

"We should get to packing for you, they leave tomorrow." He mumbles

"Alright, then let's get this done so I can lay down." I smile at him

"After we are finished, I can send your things to your brother and we can lay down together." He speaks

"You aren't working in the Loggia tonight?" I ask

"I quit that. I can't continue painting it, it just doesn't make me happy." He explains

"I agree, move on to better things. Do something that inspires you." I express

Something that inspires you.

Little footsteps can be heard approaching us and little Antonio peeks into the room.

"Mother! Father! I missed you!" He exclaims in excitement.

Sandro gets up and holds him up in his arms.

"We've missed you too, and guess what? I'll be sleeping with you two tonight!" He says with such a glowing smile on his face

I watch Antonio and how he interacts with Sandro. I think of how it will go when the time comes where I will have to tell him. I think of just never telling him and just leaving things where they are, but I also think maybe he would find out. It was a huge thing that happened in the city and everyone knows about it.

He should know who his father is.

I observe some of his mannerisms and his face, and wow. I watch his smile in slow motion in my head and I'm back, right on that street at night talking with Francesco.

Francesco truly does live on through our child. I almost think of it as a second chance to get it right, but Antonio is his own person. His personality is his own.

I see the tender side of Francesco in him. The silly side of him. It makes my heart swell as I think of the love we had. He truly was my absolute soulmate. Sandro and I have our own deep love and connection to each other and Francesco couldn't touch that either. I have my own separate love for both of them and I have made my peace with that.

The ghost of Francesco is in my thoughts daily and what could have been, but also Sandro is the one who hold holds me tight at night and loves my heart unconditionally.

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