When Time Runs Out (JosukexReader)

Chapter 7

I wake up feeling fatigued. I know that I got too much sleep yesterday but I can't bring myself to care. I get out of bed and head downstairs to grab some food. I see my mom cooking and smiling again. My dad is sitting at the counter reading a book. "Morning mom and dad?" They greet me in unison. How did they make up so easily? "What was yesterday about?" Both of them pretend to not hear me. I decide to drop it for now not wanting to upset them further. I take my breakfast upstairs and sit at my desk.

I wonder if our friend group is going to stay the same over the years. I know that we will Inevitably drift apart but at what point will we? Could it be as soon as graduation or would it occur in our mid-thirties? As much as I love thinking about what my life could be it does scare me.

I get bored about mid-afternoon. I debate about going to lay in my bed but decide against it fearing that I might fall asleep if I stay still. I put on shoes and go for a walk. I have always loved walks. The walking itself is ok but I love to just forget about who I am or why I feel so stressed and just focus on putting one foot in front of the other. I don't mind going on walks with other people but sometimes they think that I want to talk things over with them or race them. When in reality all I want is to not feel alone.

I find a nice field and lay down. I wish that I could just say what's on my mind more and I wish that I could be more social but no, here I lay in a field pitying myself. It's not like it's something that I can't change because I know I can if I tried but I can't find the will to change the way I act. One quote that always stood out to me was "Self-pity is easily the most destructive of the non-pharmaceutical narcotics; it is addictive, gives momentary pleasure, and separates the victim from reality."- John Gardner. That is one of my favorite quotes. I remember when my teacher put it up on the board to spark a conversation. A lot of people disagreed with it but if you think about it then it makes perfect sense. When we as humans pity ourselves we do it to an excessive amount we become trapped inside our minds and start to think thoughts of how you have it worse than everyone else or how no one truly understands you. These thoughts can push you deeper and it is addictive. I feel a breeze pass by. I might just be holding onto that quote because I relate to it. I look up to the sky and think to myself. Or maybe I hold to it because I feel the need to be self-aware or else I'll be no better than everyone else addicted to self-pity.

I pick at the weeds in the field and try to make a crown. I never learned how to make one when I was little but I always tried and I would always fail. I stand up and stretch. I feel so sore. I walk more and before I know it I am near a loud party. Who throws a party on Sunday and it's only around six. I have a bad feeling about this. I should turn around and go home for all I know this could be anything. I look at some of the people. I'm not recognizing anyone. What is this place? My curiosity gets the better of me. I get closer and feel myself get lost in the crowd. Everything is so loud. I feel I have no control over where I go. I make it around to the backyard then hear a scream. I look around and see two people fighting and it looks like one of them has a cheerleader screaming for him. I try to back up but get pushed forward. I still can't tell how or who the other guy is. I get closer then I hear the other speak. "No one gets away with talking shit about my bro." I know that voice. What the hell is Okuyasu doing here? I see him finally. He doesn't look that bad compared to the other guy. The other guy tries to defend himself but if he said something bad about Keicho then he isn't going to be conscious by the end of it. He is just as bad as Josuke with his hair. I watch as the guy falls to the floor but the punches don't stop. At this point, Okuyasu is missing him for the most part and hitting the ground. I go to pull him back when I see the girl break a bottle over his head. "OKUYASU!" I rush over to him. I can see some of the pieces are stuck in his skin. I know that they have a thing called stands and that Josuke has a healing one. I take a breath and speak. "Is Josuke here?" He tries to nod his head. " Don't move," I yell at the girl to make sure neither of them moves. I rush around yelling Josuke's name. I see him by the stairs. He looked up for a second but he didn't see me. I get close enough to hear him. "Amanda, listen I know it seems like I don't care about you but I do and maybe we could try dating ok just, please be patient and don't go telling everyone." "Of course. Thank you." I wasn't expecting that but I can't focus on that. I push through the rest of the crowd and they aren't there anymore. I see them heading towards the front door. They can't be leaving right now. It's still early. I still need help please, just let me help one of my closest friends.