Chapter 1
My life turned upside down after what happened.
I know that every once in a while, people think that life is unfair. I don't actually believe in it but after the tragedy that happened with my family, I thought that the world is wrong and we are not treated fairly.
As I sat down on the plane flying towards Manila, I had regret on why I didn't spend more time with them when they are still alive. Many what ifs are also running inside my head. Like, what if I was with them when the incident happened. In that way, I am not feeling this grief inside me.
My life had been perfect but it is a lot worse at this moment.
I just hope that this is a nightmare. But it is not. This is the reality.
I was placed in Tita Emma's custody as I had no other relatives. Although I know how to handle myself, I still need some guidance. Ang alam ko ay siya muna ang mamamahala sa negosyo ni Mommy hanggang sa makagraduate ako ng college.
Hindi ako nabigyan ng pagkakataon ng makilala siya hanggang sa araw na iyon. Matalik na kaibigan siya ni Mommy at ang alam ko ay lumaki sila ng magkasama at nag-aral sa iisang eskwelahan. Napunta lang siya ng Maynila dahil taga roon ang lalaking napangasawa niya habang si Mommy naman ay nanatili sa Davao dahil doon nakatira si Daddy.
Pinipigilan ko ang mga luha ko habang nasa eroplano. Hindi ko pa rin maintindihan kung bakit naging malupit sa akin ang mundo. I just lost my family and I was flying away from home with a woman I barely know. How unfair.
I looked at Tita Emma. I didn't know what she's thinking but she looked nervous and it's like she wanted to say something but she couldn't.
"Is there anything wrong, Tita?" I asked.
She swallowed hard. "Charm, did I ever tell you that there were seven boys at home?"
"No, Tita. Baka po nawala na rin sa isip mo dahil sa mga nangyari. That's fine with me as long as they are good," nginitian ko siya.
Deep inside me, I am nervous. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko sila papakisamahan. I am not friendly but I hope they are kind and easy to be with. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin alam kung paano magaadjust sa set-up na ganito.
It took us two hours before arriving in the airport. Hindi ako makagalaw nang mag landing ang eroplano, hindi pa rin makapaniwala na nasa ibang lugar na ako. Naghintay lang kami ni Tita Emma sa airport at inabangan ang asawa niya na susundo sa'min.
Later on, a man finally approached us. Nang makalapit siya ay agad niyang niyakap si Tita Emma. She cried in his shoulder. There was some deep dark part of me that didn't feel bad for her. Nawalan siya ng kaibigan, pero nawalan ako ng pamilya.
Unlike her, I didn't have a shoulder to cry on because my entire family was gone.
This deep, dark part of me couldn't help but blame her. I know it's not her fault pero hindi naman aalis ang pamilya ko ng araw na iyon kung hindi dahil sa kanya. Ipinilig ko ang ulo ko. I clear my nasty thoughts, a sign of respect. She had only shown me kindness. Mag-isa na lang dapat ako kung wala siya ngayon. That's why I'm still thankful to her.
"Hindi sana mangyayari 'yon kung hindi dahil sa akin. Buhay pa sana sila ngayon," she cried.
"It's no one's fault," he uttered.
Nahimasmasan na si Tita at nahihiyang tumingin sa'kin.
"I'm sorry for that Charmaine. By the way, this is my husband, your Tito Michael."
He held his hand for me. Hindi ko alam kung tatanggapin ko ba iyon. Maybe he didn't know how to approach me. But then, I shook his hand. I couldn't help but tighten my grip. Maybe anticipating that their presence means a lot to me.
