Winter Blooms (Alec Lightwood)

🗝 Chapter Forty-Six 🗝

Varian and Alec parted ways with Jem Carstairs and Tessa Gray in the same square that they had all met.

The Warlock had felt almost reluctant to leave her, some part of him connected his presence to hers in a way that he would not usually like. She was safety, she was familiar, and in some way she brought him comfort.

Alec wanted to find another Warlock to send them home, the vague anxiety that he felt about over straining Varian radiated off of him in a grey-yellow color. Alec always found himself thinking of Varian in every situation, rather than himself.

When Varian gripped his coat with shaking hands, Alec felt as though his heart would break. He was meant to be this strong protecting force, this unwavering support for everyone in his life, and more than anything he was. But with Varian in his arms, he felt a sense of fear that he may not be enough.

And then Varian smiled at him and pulled him through the streets of Venice, a bright look in his eyes that made Alec's heart race.

Alec did not care much for the Mundane city. It's appearance similar in part to a sector of Idris, it felt as though he had seen it all before. But Varian's excitement made his reluctance to wander fade just a bit.

When they started towards the canal's, Varian's grip on his hand tightened. But that was the only change in the Warlock's demeanor. Alec knew that his boyfriend feared the water, that even the idea of crossing a bridge petrified him. But in this moment he leaned into his trust of Alec, rather than his fear of the water.

"I grew up visiting here Darling." Varian gaze did not waver as they crossed the canal. His hands brushing across the handrails and tracing the outlines of the buildings that surrounded them. "Baba enjoyed the way the city made him feel connected to old friends and I loved the feeling of the magic in the air."

He paused mid-step and Alec bumped into his back, his hands reaching to hold Varian's waist in a way of stopping him from falling. 

Varian barely gave him a glance before shutting his eyes and taking in a deep breath. "You can smell it in the air, feel it in the people." The energy moving through the air was permeable to Varian, but to Alec the Mundane world felt the same as it usually did.

Mundane.

Alec's hold didn't waver as Varian leaned back into his chest, his own back pressing into the railing behind him for support. The beautiful smile that decorated his boyfriends face falling as he leaned into Alec's chest.

"When Valentine took me, months ago, I thought he would make an attempt to use my gifts. It was a fear that always sat in the back of my mind, especially when I had full control of the Warlock side of me." Varian sighed, "But when the Maletdi came from below decks, I thought the water was a better place for me."

Varian shivered and Alec's grip tightened on his waist. Alec leaned down, pressing a kiss into his boyfriends temple.

"But it moved impossibly fast, grabbing my with a grip that felt like ice. The moment the Maletdi touched me, all fire in my heart faded. The heavenly fire that I had always had in my veins disappearing from something as simple as a touch from the right person."

Alec watched closely as Varian took a deep breath, his head falling back to rest on Alec's collarbone. To anyone looking on, they Shadowhunter-Warlock pair looked like a young Mundane couple admiring the sunset. But only Alec knew of how hard this story was for his partner to share.

"Valentine didn't even know I was his son." Varian's voice held no emotion, despite the obvious terror that he felt. "He spoke while the Maledti worked. Telling the story of how he used Angel blood on Jocelyn while she was pregnant and that if he had known that I existed he would have tried something different."

Alec wanted Varian to stop, to not overdo the situation. His grip tightened on Varian's waist. He pressed his nose into the beautiful white of Varian's hair, "You can stop. If you need too."

Varian leaned into the touch and shook his head. "I need to say this." His partner took a deep breath in.

"Valentine called me wicked." Speaking these words, Varian's voice broke. "And then he quoted the Bible. The goddamn Bible. Like some prophet."

Alec could feel the tension in his partner's shoulders, his hands moving in comforting circles on his waist as he waited for Varian to continue.

"And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the Earth, to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the Beasts of the Earth." The sound that left his partners lips was one of a pained laugh. Alec pressed a kiss to his shoulder. "Those words will not leave my head."

Alec hated the fear that sat in his partners voice.

"The Maledti took the color from the world, the magic from the air. I felt empty and impossible numb." Varian's voice fell into its usual timbre. "And then Valentine took my Warlock mark."

A gasp passed through Varian's throat, as if he had forgotten to breath for a moment to long.

"And they shall be made to crawl on their bellies to enter the kingdom of darkness." Varian's turned in Alec's arms, pressing his face into his partners chest in a way to seek the comfort of his touch.

The words felt ominous and terrified Alec more than anything else.

"This is my past." Varian did not lean away to continue speaking. "The violence that Valentine committed against me in that moment will not leave my mind, and yet with you the memories are dull. I will not forget what he did from me, but with you the memories are simply that."

Varian stood on his toes, pressing a kiss into Alec's jaw.

"With you, the past is the past." Varian kissed his cheek. "And my future belongs to you."

Varian kissed him.

And Alec left the city with a love for Venice.

~~~

A/N: Sorry again for being so late. Finals and auditions and papers and everything is in the way.

Hopefully will be updating on a regular schedule soon.