I Found You

I

ROSELLA

There have been many times thorough my career that I have been challenged by my own doubts.

We are in September, 2020, after long months of lockdown in the UK, and finally back into training. For two months prior, we have been training in tough restrictions because of the pandemic but now, for the first time in a whole year, we knew we could play professional games again. After sleepless nights of overthinking about my place in this world and how my life had no meaning anymore - yes, I even though about dying for a few weeks - this news was what kept me alive, with my teammates also. 

I have been playing for Tottenham for a year now, and have made lifelong friends - I cannot start to explain how people like Gemma Davidson or Rianna Dean have helped me on so many levels. My relationship with my father has always been quite rocky, so I had to fill his absence in any way that I could - but sometimes, no matter what you do and how well you succeed, you cannot make your parents change their mind about this perfect image they have of you. With him, it changed when I did my coming out years ago: although he was absent before that, he never bothered to talk to me again once he knew I was attracted to girls. 

This morning, my teammate Josie Green (cf picture underneath) came to pick me up in order to go to training. 

Today might be a very special day for many of our fans: indeed, a few weeks ago, the club announced the signing of international players Alex Morgan, Alanna Kennedy and Shelina Zadorsky. The forward from the USA, as well as the two defenders from Australia and Canada respectively, are considered to be the best players on our team, although they haven't even played a singe game yet - to be honest, sometimes fame really pisses me off, especially when it is undeserved to be considered as goddesses while the rest of us is just less famous.

When we arrive at the training facility - with 20 minutes of advance, since Josie is never late and stressed for live - we immediately see the media team set to interview the three new players. I know I shouldn't make such a fuss out of this, but somehow I really didn't care about the three players: all they are going to do is put my friends and I in the shadow, regardless of all the hard work we have accomplished beforehand. 

Sensing how tensed I am, Josie raises her eyebrow at me and says in a whisper:

"Play nice, Rosie - they are amazing assets for our team, and it's all that matters."

"Mh" I just let out, faithless. 

And this is when I see them - at least, two of them.

I immediately recognise Alex Morgan's bright blue eyes and characteristic slim figure, as she is talking to the press with such ease that I was almost impressed. In her arms, her daughter Charlie is sleeping, holding her mother tightly, while her husband, Servando, is smiling widely while looking at them - perfect fucking hetero-normative family my ass, I think to myself, as the journalist is laughing at one of Alex's joke.

Further away from us is Alanna Kennedy, obviously struggling at understanding the journalist's thick British accent - it kind of makes me laugh that people from outside the UK sometimes don't understand shit about what we're saying, even though they originally speak the same language than we do. Alright, you might say I mock people too much, but really it is only my personality : I always stand defensive, ready for people to deceive me. 

When she spots Josie and I in our Tottenham training jerseys, she excuses herself to the journalist and actively walks toward us. Josie warns me with a smile that I better behave. 

Alanna immediately smiles her teeth out and give us her hand to shake, easily speaking out:

"Oi there!" she exclaims in a typical Brisbane accent, her voice only announcing friendly intentions. As Josie smiles back at her, I remain neutral, as the blonde goes on: "I'm Alanna, your new teammate! Glad to meet you ! What are you name again?"

"Josie" my teammate immediately says, shaking her hand willingly. Realising that I wasn't going to do the same, she takes the lead and announces: "And this is Rosella, she's kind of a wild one: social relationships aren't her thing, so excuse her apparent coldness - she's actually all right when she stops being a bitch."

Alanna seems to find this funny, as I fake-smile at her, as Josie bursts into laughter.

Their laughs invade the room, as everybody else look our way, including a gee-eyed brunette, who I don't recognise in the beginning.

Her long, brown hair was dotted with blonde highlights, which was making them glow. The contrast with her very special eye colour - that could be described as a thunderstorm when the sun was there as well - really put her in the archetypical beauty type over which every basic white guy would masturbate at night. Maybe it was this - or maybe rather the seemingly cold bitch face she was putting on - that made me dislike her immediately.

I sense her gaze on me for a few seconds, before she focuses back on the interview. Meanwhile, Alanna and Josie catch me looking at her, smirking. 

After a few seconds, Alanna says:

"I can't wait to meet the rest of the team and play with all of you! What times does training start?"

"You should know that already" I bitterly let out, rolling my eyes.

Instead of taking my words seriously, the blonde smirks and seems to mock my lack of tactfulness. 

"We begin in 15 minutes" Josie says, throwing me a dark stare. While Alanna thankfully nods her head, she adds: "The rest of our teammates should be there soon: let's go get ready!"

As Alanna follows Josie, I throw an ultimate stare at the two foreign girls, before rolling my eyes and going in order to put my cleats on for training: somehow, I wasn't feeling those two girls...

But I had to play fair: if I accidentally hurt one of them during training or didn't play nice, it would fall on me - after all, they are the stars, not me...

Without really knowing why, Shelina Zadorsky was pissing me off already only five minutes after training started...