seduce and destroy

youre a little much for me

Emerys POV

Once we got to our room, he wouldn't say a word to me. i could tell he had a lot on his mind, and was angry. this made me feel bad, because it was my fault. everything's ALWAYS my fault. no wonder my mother never loved me, no wonder my dad disappeared, no wonder my cat ran away. i'm just a screwed up, quirky, different girl who will never be enough💔

"i'm sorry." i say quietly, my arms folded and my eyes watery. i closed my eyes, waiting for him to yell at me.

but no. he didn't say anything, which was somehow even worse.

i sighed. stupid, emotional, obsessive little me ruins everything and now the man who has probably hated me the most out of everyone i've crossed paths with hates me so much he cant even look into my blue orbs that look clear in the sunlight.

an hour passes, sitting alone in the tiny motel room while harry was doing, well, i never found out. probably runnings errands, probably running away, leaving me here.

within the next 30 minutes, he returns, and i cant lie when i say i was grateful.

"i've gotten in contact with liam, theyll track us down and pick us up" is what he says, the first words he's spoken to me in hours.

i smile in excitement.

"...but we're still going to have to stay the night" he cleared his throat, and we both looked down to the ground in unison.

everything goes quiet, the only thing i could hear was the ratchet air conditioner that barely even worked.

"you don't have to sleep on the floor, i guess."

i looked up to him, a shocked expression on my face. "oh...so will you be sleeping on the floor then?"

he put his hands behind his back, looking up. "the beds big enough for both of us. we'll just stay very far apart."

my heart stings. "ok." is all i say.

everything was so awkward for no reason. at this point, i was just desperate for him to start yelling at me, start throwing things, anything. this wasn't the harry i knew, i just wanted him to look at me, even if it was with hatred in his green orbs.

the day bled into nightfall, and i decided instead of sitting in lonely silence that i would take a shower. i walked into the musty bathroom, stripping down 😏. i sighed, my feet tapping against the cold tiled floor into the shower, and turned on the water. it felt nice and cool on my skin, and i just stood there, my head down. i closed my eyes, clearing my mind, pretending that i wasn't in this position. that i was in a loving home, with loving parents, and i was normal. i just wanted to be normal and loved.

i jump when i hear the door creak open.

"em?" harry asks softly, a tone i've never heard come out of his mouth.

i take in a deep breathe. "yeah?"

"um...can i brush my teeth?" he asks, and i just make a little noise that sounds like a yes.

i stand their in silence as i hear harry turn the faucet on, brushing his pearly whites.

everything's kinda peaceful. like it makes sense. it feels right.

i turn the water off, and i stand their shivering, too shy to reach for the towel. "um, harry." i squeak.

"oh." is all he says, handing me a towel. i quickly wrap it around my body.

"im gonna go to bed, m'tired." he states, walking out of the bathroom immediately. did he find me disgusting?

i quickly brush my hair and teeth, putting on the clothes i was wearing earlier although it was drenched in sweat and self pity.

i walk out, and see him curled up at the very edge. guess he really didn't want to be by me. i lift the covers, sliding myself in.

no. i was done. i was done with him giving me the silent treatment.

"why do you hate me, harry? why did you even buy me in the first place?"

he turns on his other side to face me, and for the first time all day his eyes finally meet mine.

"you're too good for this world, em." he whispers. "too good for me."

i give him a confused expression.

"i have to hate you, it has to be this way."

"why? says who?"

he takes in a shaky sigh, sitting up. "you remind me of my mother."

"oh-"

no offense but what the fuck.

"she's dead. died when i was 3. my dad blamed me because i ran into the road and she tried saving me, which resulted in her getting hit instead. he ended up dying when i was 7, and i had to fend for myself on my own. then i met the boys, which made me meet..."

"who?"

he shakes his head. "not important. the thing is." he takes another deep breathe. "i cant lose anybody else important to me. i cant go through that. i cant..." he lets out a sob, and i try to hold in my laugh. he was an ugly crier. af. ",i think i'm falling in love with you, is what i'm trying to say."

i think i shit my pants.

"and i tried pushing you away but i cant. i'm in love with you, emery."

he's in love with me? i swear he hated me like five minutes ago.

this made me think, did i love him?

love was a strong word.

"Harry, i-" i cut myself off. all that ugly crying and sobbing must've made him sleepy, because he was passed out. he looked so nice and soft and innocent. he was so beautiful, like you could never guess that this man had such darkness and pain in his heart.