Perhaps "fuck off" might be too kind

Part 23 - To be back

"Hey motherfuckers. Well I'm not coming back to Sheffield with you guys. I will come back at some point but at this very moment I just need some time. I'm safe so no need to worry about that. Yours truly Aura's Kidnapper"

3 weeks later... Sunday 30 March 2003

That was the last text I send to a group chat with all of my friends in it. I had already talked with my parents and told them I needed a break to collect myself again. I was now living in London with my brother and his bandmates. They were doing really great and had a show at least every week. They were called 'River of Shadows' and played rock/indie rock. Cam's bandmates were Luna on the bass, Roland on the drums and Damiano as the lead guitar and singer. Cam played the guitar. 

I always knew who the 2 guys were but I had never met them. And for Luna it was the first time I had met her/ or heard about her when I was on their apartment's front door step. I later found out Luna was Cam's girlfriend. Honestly they deserved each other and were so cute together. Both Damiano and Roland were also in relationships. I met their girlfriend a couple times and they were nice too but nothing could compare to Luna.

I had gotten really close with them all. I mean for fuck sake I lived with them and spend every hour of every day with them. Damiano taught me how to play the guitar and I had gotten really good at it. I had my breakdowns with Luna at 2 am. Roland and Cam would try to set me up with almost everyone they saw but I just couldn't think about being with anyone else then Brian. 

It was so bad at the start of it. I would go days by just crying my eyes out. And when I wasn't crying I was writing sad poems about Brian. It had gotten a lot better but I was even more scared to open up to people now that one guy I really trusted fucked me over. 

The band did everything they could to make me forget Brian. They would bring me to all of their rehearsals, shows and get my opinion on their songs. They helped so much. 

I hadn't talked to anyone from Sheffield. I mean I had barely used my phone. Luna made me block Brian's number and just told me to take a break from everything at home, so we decided it would be a great idea to lock my phone into a safe box.

It was now time for me to leave them and return home. It was gonna be sad to say goodbye to them all. I was for sure gonna miss them but I missed my friends at home so much.

I had to take the train so they all drove me to the station to drop me off. We were now standing on the platform with the train to Sheffield right next to us. I went to hug Roland first.

"Hey Aura you better not go back to that slutty motherfucker or else I will kill him and make sure you never can go back to him" Roland said to me with an evil smile. I punched his arm lightly.

"Shut the fuck up, you can barely open a can how do you think you are gonna kill a person?" I said.

"Well first I will-" Roland started but Luna interrupted him.

"Okay that's enough Ro, be careful babe and say hello to Alex from me" Luna smirked. I had told her about me and Alex history and all she thought was that I liked him. She was like a teacher for small kids that would be like 'those you tease are normally the ones you like'. Yeah as much as I told her I really didn't like him in that way, she wouldn't stop teasing me about him. I mean I didn't hate him as much as before. Mostly cause the last time I saw him there was like a spark or some type or shit...idk what it was but it felt good for once not arguing with him.

I hugged Luna goodbye and went to Damiano.

"Come here you little kid" Damiano said. I gave him annoyed look.

"I'm not even that much younger than you, it's like only 2 years" I rolled my eyes. 

"Stop rolling those eyes at me young lady, or else I will have to punish you" Damiano pointed a finger at me. I grabbed his finger with my hand, like a baby would. I then twisted it but it only made it worse for me cause he twisted me around of he had me in a headlock while my back was on his chest. "Not so tough now how?" He whispered into my ear.

"Wow I am so gonna miss this" I said sarcastically while I rolled my eyes at him again. He pulled out of his headlock and turned me around and hugged me. 

"Jokes aside watch out for yourself" He said while he rocked me from side to side. 

"I will Damiano. Remember to say goodbye to Yourse from me" I said. Yourse was his girlfriend. Damon just smiled and nodded.

I then went straight into my brothers arms.

"Fuck I'm gonna miss you" I said to him.

"Hey bubs I love you and you fucking got this. I mean your friends sound fucking amazing so they will be there for you when you need them" Cam said still hugging me. He then pulled away. "Say hello to dad for me, but don't you dare to say hello to mum from me" 

"She has gotten better. I mean still the small arguments every once awhile but she is starting to apologize, so that's progress" I said.

"Well I believe it when I see it for myself" Cam said.

I took my stuff and walked towards the train's entrance. I looked back and waved at them one last time while smiling like a fool. 

I took a seat in the train and for some weird reason almost no one was in it. Only me and a few old people in the back. Anyways I got whole 4 seats to myself. My phone was still locked so I turned it on. I had about 50 messages. Just some of them..

Sender: Jamie

I hope you are okay. You know I'm fucking worried for you like all the time and this is for sure not helping that I have no idea where you are or who you are with. But I believe you when you say you are okay, well I hope you are not lying, fuck it just text me when you have time

Sender: Alex

Heyyyyyy. Fuck that sounded weird. Idk I just wanted again to apologize for the way I have been treating ya, it hasn't been fair towards you, but I would rather much do this in person, so tell me when you are back and we can talk

Sender: Nick

HELLO KIDNAPPER. Is there any way you have room for one more cause I have this motherfucker who hasn't been doing as daddy says lately. I mean I happily would pay for it. And I may throw a few extra bucks in for you to throw them on him when you make him go on the strip pole.

Sender: Miles

Babe you better get your ass back here, I ain't done drinking with ya. I mean you can't leave ya drinking buddy alone. And I swear if you get drunk without me, I will drink Martines without you. Okay now jokes aside, I hope you are okay and take as much time as you need. Love ya

I didn't respond to any of them, just cause I would much rather see them in person instead. I had really missed their hugs and their humor. 

I fell asleep on the train and woke up 2 minutes before I was in High Green. I gathered all my stuff and walked out of the train. I had to walk all the way home at 11 pm. Fucking great. But Adam's shop was still open so I decided to go there.

I walked in and saw Adam sweeping the floor. 

"Well hello Adam" I said with a bug smile on my lip. He turned around and his face lit up. That really warmed my heart.

"Aura! You are back" Adam yelled. "Well good to see you"

"You too. I had to leave for awhile just to find myself or what ever those cheesy movies say" I told him.

"Well as welcome back gift you can have some free cigs. Camel activate?" 

"You know me too well" I smiled.

"Well it's getting late and you need your sleep for tomorrow so goodnight" Adam said and handed me the cigs.

I walked onto the street again and passed the corner. I remembered it was there I met Alex for the first time. Well still a stubborn motherfucker but it had gotten better.

I entered the house and I was lifted up in the air by my dad. 

"God I have missed you" My dad said and hugged me tight.

"I missed you too" I said

"Hello Aura" My mother appeared from the doorframe. I really didn't knew how she would react for me to me home again. "It's nice to have you back"

"It's nice to be back" I smiled.