I don't know how to start this entry and I don't know how to end it. I'm just feeling depressive pretty badly lately.
Plus the isolation and separation I've had since I dropped out is enormous. Everyone is always busy and I'm finding myself relating more to older people with kids than people my age.
And the urges are coming back again and hard. I don't want to go down that road again. It's been about 9 months that I've been clean from that. But it would be so easy. And no one would notice. It's not like I'm having sex or many people are seeing me. Besides, I've gotten good at lying about stuff like that from the years of lying about that one event.
I'm not going to worry about it now. It will just make my migraine worse.
