Don't Test Me

Chapter 23

Nate was still there talking to Renee on my phone when I got out of the shower. I dressed quickly and made my way to the kitchen. I filled my mug with coffee and headed outside to the fire pit with my cigarettes. I was only out there for a moment when Judy and Rex started to cross the yard to join me.

"Good morning Margot." She sang as she sat across from me. I passed her my pack of smokes and lighter. Judy smiled and took them from me. We lit up and settled into our morning routine.

"What do you think we will make for lunch today?" I asked her. Judy thought for a moment, "I've got some cold cuts, I was thinking just sandwiches today. I'll heat up a pot of soup and put it into some thermoses' just before we head out."

I looked at her wide eyed, "Do you make your own soups?" Judy laughed out loud, "No, I take advantage of Mr. Campbell. Soups are something I never got the hang of." I giggled.

We chatted a bit about nothing at all while we finished our smokes. As we crushed them out in the fire pit, Judy asked, "Is that Nate's truck?"

I nodded, "Yep. He came out last night and slept on the couch. Girl trouble." She nodded knowingly, "Ah yes, the drama of being young. I remember it well, but I'm glad I'm too old for that shit now."

I laughed out loud, "Yeah, I'm glad Seth and I don't have any drama. It's nice." I hadn't meant to confess that, but it slipped out. Judy smiled at me and simply nodded. She was much like her son; she didn't push me too much.

"Do you need anything from town? I'm heading in this afternoon to pick up some stuff for a BBQ tomorrow night with friends." I offered. She nodded, "Yeah actually I have a couple of things on the list next to the phone. I'll give you some cash to pick them up for me. It's just grocery store stuff. Thank you, Margot." I simply smiled at her.

I sighed, "I'm also stopping in at work to see about going back. My wrist is better; I might be able to go back a bit early." Judy stared at me, "That will be a tough day for me, I'm going to miss our morning rituals."

I chuckled at first until I realized I wouldn't be able to have coffee with her and walk the farm with Rex. I wouldn't be able to prepare lunch for Seth and Chris. I'd be at work, making food for the patients, which was great of course but I wouldn't be out at the farm. I realized I would miss it terribly, I enjoyed the peace and quiet out there. It was like a sanctuary. I glanced at Rex as he lay sleepily in the sun, "I'm going to miss it too, Judy. Believe me."

She leaned back in the chair, "But I get it, you have to make a living. I'm sure you miss the patients at the home too. I know my dad misses you. I haven't told him about you and Seth because I left that up to you, but I know it would probably make his year." I laughed out loud and shook my head.

"When I stop in at work I will stop by and see him for sure." I said. Judy nodded as she sipped her coffee. We stayed together for a while in the sunlight and enjoyed the silence before Judy rose and said she was going to make the sandwiches for lunch. She told me not to worry about anything this morning, she would take care of it. We planned to meet at the old farm truck by 11:30am to run it all out to the fields. As I watched her and Rex walk back to the farm house I smiled. She was a wonderful woman; my boyfriend's mom was so great.

I went back into the trailer to find Nate still on my phone. That boy was running down my battery, I thought to myself. I was sure his dad would be looking for him this morning but he didn't seem to care. It was as though that phone connecting him to Renee was all that mattered in the world. I smiled and headed to the bedroom to give them some privacy.

The sheets smelled like Seth and I, a wonderful mix of both of us. I had left my scent in his bed, I'd never stayed long enough to leave my scent anywhere but my own place. It wasn't the smell of sex either that filled my senses, it was the smell of our sleep, our kisses, our cuddles. I realized it was the smell of love, belonging and home. I realized I felt more at home with Seth then I'd ever felt before. I'd made my own home in town, and I was proud of it. I was alright on my own, I was used to it. However, there was something comforting in the realization that I could feel safe with him. I had allowed myself to feel safe and he had delivered. Seth had earned my trust with patience and consistency, he believed I was worthy. For the first time in my life, I felt worthy of something that good. I let it engulf me. I deserved to be that happy, I was worthy, I was good enough.

Nate knocked on the door softly and said through the door, "Hey Margot, I am off the phone. Sorry I ran down your battery." I rose off the bed and crossed the room to open the door. I took it from his hand and followed him out to the kitchen.

As I sat down at the table I asked, "So, how'd it go?" He looked at me and smiled softly, "Well, she agreed to let me come to see her this weekend. I know dad is going to be pissed but I don't care. I have to see her."

I nodded as I invited him to sit down, "That's great, Nate. I'm happy for you." He sat across from me and said, "Thank you for getting her on the phone. She said you seemed like a good egg, she liked you."

I laughed, "I know a girl who is a lot like her, so I had a pretty good idea how she was feeling. You should get going before your dad has a fit." He laughed but nodded. As we rose up he reached over and gave me a quick hug before running out the door. I wasn't expecting it but I accepted it with a smile. He was a good guy, he was pretty crazy about Renee, I knew they would find their way.

When I picked up my phone I realized I had a couple of messages. I checked to see Matt had texted me, when I opened it I saw, 'So Ashley and I got back together and now she won't sleep with me! She said she doesn't trust me not to hurt her now! WTF!?'

I laughed, poor bastard. I rolled my eyes and texted back, 'Have you talked to her about why you broke up in the first place?' I was betting he hadn't. Who wanted to have those difficult conversations, I sure didn't. I knew Matt was a good guy, but he could be a bit dense sometimes. I shuffled around the kitchen and took out some chicken for supper. I decided to make a casserole for us, the chicken would thaw and be ready for me to cook after I got back from town in the afternoon.

Matt responded, 'Should I?' I chuckled, 'Yep. If you want to get back into her pants you should probably talk to her about what went wrong the first time.'

Seth send me a message just after I replied to Matt, 'We should have shower sex more often. It was really hot this morning.' I giggled, 'Yeah, I have to admit, I liked it too.'

I decided to start cleaning the bathroom, since I was sure the last time it had been touched was the first time I stayed overnight out at Seth's. He had a limited supply of cleaning supplies so I used some Mr. Clean and Windex. That was literally all he had. When I was in the middle of scrubbing the tub I got another message from Matt, 'This is a lot of work to get laid you know. It's kind of bullshit.'

I sighed, 'So right there. Ashley wants a relationship and you just want to fuck. That tells me that you want different things. If she's not worth the work to you, then maybe you should think about if this is what you really want.' I sent him the message and continued to scrub the shower walls. Not long ago, I was right where he was. I didn't want to talk about how I felt, in fact sometimes I still didn't. I knew Matt was lonely and he wanted to warm his bed, but it seemed Ashely wasn't interested in that. I shook my head as I finished the tub and moved to the sink.

Seth send me a cutesy message full of kissy faces and hearts. I replied with the eye rolling emoji which he laughed at. He knew I hated those things, he just sent them to me to get a reaction. Silly boyfriend.