Something so divine (Jake enhypen)

Empty heart

Have you ever been happy for a long period of time? Happy to the point where you started waiting for something bad to happen.

Nari had a gut feeling that something bad was bound to happen for weeks now, but everything kept turning out great. This continued until one day one call proved Nari that she should always trust her gut feeling.

The doorbell has been ringing for quite some time now but Nari couldn't collect enough energy to open it. Joy's barking kept becoming louder and louder urging Jake to not give up just yet.

Finally the front door opened to reveal to Jake a fragile Nari. Her eyes were still watery and bright red from all of the crying, the bags under her eyes got a dark shade of purple and her button nose was pink. Jake without thinking for a second hugged her tight giving his shoulder for her to cry on.

They were now in the living-room of Nari's apartment, sitting on the couch facing each other. Nari looked at Jake in the eyes and the boy's heart broke seeing her once bright eyes so dull. Nari was hesitating to speak when Jake cut the silence short.
'You don't have to tell me what happened. I'll always be here for you, okay?' He said engulfing her in another hug.
'Thank you...' The girl whispered tears running down her face again.

------

Days have passed since that day. Nari was mostly with her two best friends. Jake later on found out that the reason why Nari was so shaken up was the death of her mother. He would always ask about her well being from her friends, but for some reason he couldn't face the broken girl himself. But today, he gathered all of his care for her and faced her.

'How have you been?' He asked as soon as Nari opened the door.
'Less like shit.' She answered chuckling to herself.
'I've been wanting to talk to you but I was scared.' Jake confessed when they were sitting on the couch of Nari's living-room.
'Scared?' The girl questioned. 'Of what? me?' 'No, of course not. I was scared to say something wrong, but I realized there's nothing right to say to begin with. This is just how shitty life is sometimes.' Jake said looking down on the floor.
'Yeah, very shitty.' She said leaning her head on his shoulder.

'My mom wasn't the greatest.' A sudden urge to share, to tell everything that was on her mind came like an impulse Nari couldn't control. The moment felt right to tell Jake everything, everything she was so scared to voice out. 'She was an addict. She's been in and out of the rehab since I was seventeen. I always visited her and we always talked. I told her everything shared everything with her trying so hard not to blame her and understand her, but I give up.' A low sob escaped her mouth. 'I can't anymore. She left me again.' Nari closed her eyes and let the tears run down her cheeks silently. 'She killed herself.' She whispered trying so hard to keep her sobs silent, but she failed miserably. Her tears started running down faster and her whole body started shaking.

Jake embraced her, letting her cry her heart out. He started caressing her back while whispering comforting words. 'I promise you it will get better. I'm here for you, okay? I won't leave. It'll be okay. Time heals everything. I'm here. I'm here...'

----

The past few days felt so repetitive, like a broken record. The days were cloudy and fuzzy. The day of Nari's mom's funeral was no different. It was as if the skies themselves were mourning.

A single letter with a single white rose decorated the gravestone of Min Chaewon.

"I hate it. I hate how I love you, mom. How I cannot hate you not even a little bit. I hate that I miss you all the time, even though you were never around. I hate it how I cannot forgive you, but my love for you never dies.

How could you leave me so soon, mom. I was waiting for you. I believed in you, but you let me down. Sometimes I think I was never important to you, because if I was why didn't you stop, why didn't you quit. You always told me you loved me but now I see clear you lied. I hope I could tell this to your face so I wouldn't be this angry. I want to scream mom, so loud so bad, but I can't. I can't scream, mom. You took my voice the day you first went away and now I'm silent, broken but I'm strong. I will be better, better than you were. I won't forget you nor will I ever be able to forgive you. I'll just look at your mistakes like a lesson and I'll learn not to repeat them.

                                                                                                                              Goodbye forever, mom."

I want to apologize for the pain that I've caused and I hope I can be forgiven

Anywho...

I want to say if you're going tru something bad please remember everything will eventually get better just hold on a little more. Sending all my love <3