Nineteen years ago; Jessica's freshman year of college:
"You look so beautiful right there. Let me get a picture." Dennis says as he pulls out his new camera and snaps a picture. Jessica was in her lounge wear sitting on the bed in her apartment.
Her apartment was her safe place. It was decorated just how she liked it. Soft lights, greenery everywhere, neutral colors, woods, and paintings that she had created.
She had met Dennis at the beginning of the year. He was a pre med major while Jessica was in the childhood education department. Jessica was almost finished with her freshman year ending with all A's. Being away from home in her own place made her feel more at peace. Her parents bought her this apartment to help her avoid stressors and to give her privacy. It had been exactly a year since her diagnosis. She had been talking her four bottles of medication every single day and trying to work on herself. But not a single soul knew. Not even the person she loved most, Dennis.
After meeting him she felt at an all time high. He made her laugh, smile, dance and sing. He was a beautiful soul and she was madly in love with him. He was intelligent, out going, faithful and loving. He would do anything for Jessica.
"I probably look horrible." She laughs
"Not true. You look real." He smiles
"Real? Well I sure hope I do." She giggles
"When I say real I mean... you. I'm going to develop this picture, look back on it and say. This is the woman I love and will always love. Not only because she is the most beautiful human in the world, but because she is so loving, humble, and genuine." He says cuddling up next to her
"That was... wow." She smiles
"Too much?" He says with embarrassment
"No, not that. It's just no one has ever said anything like that." She starts to cry
"Jess, I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cry..." he says holding her
"Dennis you're going to look at that picture and see what you see. But when I'm going to look at it, we won't see the same thing." She starts to sob
"What do you mean?" He asks
"I'm not really who you think I am, Dennis." She mumbles
"Jess, come on. You're so hard on yourself." He says
Jessica pulls away and shakes her head. "Dennis, I'm not someone that you will love forever. I can't be loved like that." She says turning away
"Hey, hey... come on, don't talk like that. I meant what I said. You have to tell me what's going on." Dennis says trying to reach for her
She turns to him then looks down at her night stand.
"You'll leave me. It's best if you just leave now." She cries
Dennis gets off the bed and tries to comfort her. He didn't want to invade her space so he stayed a few steps back. He had never seen her like this. She was a mess.
"I'm not leaving. Please, just tell me what's going through your head, baby."
Jessica takes a deep breath and pauses for a moment. She felt so vulnerable and scared. Almost humiliated for breaking down. She thought she had control. It had been over a year since she last cried.
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