Thank you all for reading this. This isn't easy to write.
Terry passed away on January 21st 2020 and that day completely changed my life. For bad and for good.
Terry jones is my favourite python and always will be. I loved him the moment I watched Monty Python for the very first time. In truth, I have a huge crush on him. I miss him so much there are no words. I feel like a piece of me died when he passed and went to heaven with him. I will never forget that moment when I found out. I gasped. My whole body went numb and weak. I shut down. I started to panic. I cried out loud for my mom. It was traumatising to say the least. My heart was and still is shattered into a million pieces. I felt like someone ripped out my heart and stomped on it. Jonesy dead? That can't be right. I was in such denial that I made myself sick. I know he wouldn't want me to be that way. I cried so bad I don't even remember that's how bad it was. I sobbed for him to come back. I sobbed for him to save me. I was in so disbelief and pain that I thought I was gonna die. From that moment on, my life hasn't been the same. A part of me died. He had been struggling with dementia for years. The worse kind I should say, FTD. Thank god he isn't suffering anymore. Thank god that he is healthy again. I remember watching the O2 show for the first time and thinking something was up with terry. Little did I know that he was at the start of a long and painful road. But I wish not to think about the sad parts anymore. His work is, irreplaceable. No one can be as creative and talented as him. NO ONE. Terry mostly dressed in drag and it was the funniest shit to me. It still is. His style of comedy was perfection and I will never get tired of it.
Terry, thank you for every fucking thing you have taught me. Thank you for helping me through hell and back. Thank you for making me laugh when I needed it most. Thank you for everything. My heart is beyond repair as it is broken into too many pieces to count. I don't cry as much anymore, but that doesn't mean I never do. I miss you so fucking much you fucking genius.
I've heard it said, that people come into our lives, for a reason, bringing something we must learn and we are lead to those who help us most to grow, if we let them, and we help them in return. Well I don't know if I believe that's true, but I know I'm who I am today, because I knew you, like a comet pulled from orbit, as it passes a sun, like a stream that meets a Boulder, halfway through a wood, who can say if I've been changed for the better, but, because I knew you, I have been changed for good.
Rest in peace terry jones. I love you so much. I miss you.
